Nice People Get Lice Too
b y Cheryl Butler

If you’ve ever received an unexpected telephone call in the middle of the night, you might remember that heart-stopping wave of nausea you experienced as you cautiously answered the phone.  Well, five year’s ago I experienced one of those phone calls myself, but it came at noon not at midnight and I wasn’t being told a loved one had been in an accident, it was the school nurse phoning to let me know that my child’s classroom had encountered a little problem—head lice--and my daughter was one of the lucky recipients!  

Breathe, Cheryl, breathe, I told myself as I hung up the phone and drove down to school to fetch my infested youngster.  That drive to the nurse’s office was a complete blur. Not only was I in denial (this could never happen to one of my children—we bathe every day—and use soap and hot water to boot) but once I heard the word “lice” I myself began itching from head to toe, “Dear God, do I have it too?” I panicked! 

The school nurse, who I’m certain is part angel looked into my dazed eyes and said, “It’s Ok, Mrs. Butler nice people get lice too.”  Unfortunately this wasn’t of much comfort, especially when she put my daughter under a bright fluorescent light and started swiftly moving her golden tresses around with a couple of popsicle sticks so I could see for myself what we were dealing with.  In less than a minute I went from feeling mortified to being completely horrified as I realized the extent of the problem.  We weren’t talking about a few lice we were talking several colonies!

Next came the informational talk—which will stay with me for the rest of my life. It started with the ditto that dutifully comes home in our children’s backpacks during the first week of school--the one with the magnified drawing of a louse—the single, six-legged parasite that multiplies faster than rabbits which then in turn qualifies them to be called lice.  If you have kids in school, surely you’ve received one of these important handouts at one time or another.   Sadly, I admit that I never actually read them.  After a disgusted glance, I threw them away because I was positive nothing like this would ever happen to one of my kids.  Well now it was payback time.  The nurse went through the “pest packet” word for word just in case I had any questions.  I had only one.  How long would it take to get rid of them?  I was assured if I followed the “Delousing  Guidelines” we’d be in the clear within a few days.

All my life my middle name has been “naïve” and this time proved no different.  A few days turned into nearly six weeks!  Although it was five year’s ago, I can still recall the entire saga like it was yesterday, so allow me to give you a quick overview of how these bloodsucking creatures operate and perhaps you can learn from my mistakes.

It all starts with a nit—the teeny, tiny yellowish-white, oval-shaped egg that is laid by the head louse. (Now you know where the term nitwit comes from.)  Not only are these eggs difficult to see, they have a glue-like substance that allows them to hang to the hair shaft for dear life--hurricane forced winds couldn’t blow one away!  Once laid it takes 7 – 10 days for these eggs to hatch and another 7 – 10 days for the female to mature and begin laying more eggs.  Ah, nature!

Lice, my friends, are the size of sesame seeds and are clear in color until they start feeding on your child’s precious blood at which time they take on a brownish-red hue.  Did I mention they have claws to grasp the strands of hair?  That said, they are crawling insects—they don’t hop, jump or fly.  Bear with me now because “hair” (pardon the fun pun) is where it gets interesting.  Head lice can survive for approximately 30 days on a host (your sweet child) and a female louse can lay up to 100 nits. (The cycle of life!)  

The good news (if that is what you can call it) is that they cannot live on pets—they only feed on human blood and will usually not survive for more than 24 hours once they are removed from their host’s generous head of hair.  How about all that itching you ask?  With lice bites come itching and scratching. However, the itching may not always start right away - that depends on how sensitive your child's skin is to the lice. It can sometimes take weeks for kids with lice to start scratching and by now your child has his own Super 8 Motel attached to the neck, as was the case with my daughter’s hair. 

The minute I left the school parking lot, I made my first of many trips to the drugstore to discreetly purchase over- the- counter lice removal kits.  I literally put all my eggs (sorry, not funny!) in one basket thinking that if I followed the directions precisely, we could “rid” my daughter of these horrendous creatures within a few days.  After the first treatment, which took me 6 grueling hours to complete, I knew we were in trouble.

The sink was crawling with so many of them (after the toxic treatment we had just completed) that I grabbed a pair of scissors and reduced the length of her hair by nearly 10 inches!  We both spent the first two days crying! 

My wrists ached from using the special nit- remover comb for hours every day.  Removing the lice itself is not enough.  The secret, I was told, was proper nit removal.    It’s those unborn nits that are the real culprits. She missed nearly two week’s of school (part of the reason school infestations last so long is because children return back too quickly.) and a week after she returned to class those nits were back in full force, and I was headed for a nervous breakdown.

Miraculously, none of my other children caught this highly contagious nightmare, and though I scratched for over a month, it was only a sympathy reaction for what my daughter was going through.  I can’t tell you how many loads of bedding, pillows and other household items I dutifully washed in piping hot water.  I placed plastic coverings in the car, the sofas and even her mattress.  Lice removal became nearly a full-time job.  I now felt qualified to seek employment as an exterminator.

My breaking point finally came nearly six week’s into our saga as I nit-picked for the zillionth time only to find a few more eggs and legs.  Hysterical, I finally called our pediatrician.  (This, my first mistake.  I should’ve put my pride aside and done this immediately!)  Vaseline was the magic word.  I was told to smother my daughter’s head in it (because this would supposedly suffocate the lice) and then place a shower cap on her and leave it on for at least 8 hours!  I was desperate enough to try anything at this point, and this was not a harsh chemical treatment either.  Believe it or not, as with strains of various viruses, lice are actually becoming resistant to many of the over-the-counter remedies being sold, many of which have unhealthy toxins in them. 

The next morning I had to wash her hair with Dove dishwashing soap (a dozen times) but we were finally lice free!  My pediatrician also warned me to stay away from conditioner for a few weeks.  Imagine this--lice actually prefer clean, shiny hair! 

It’s now Little League Season and we’ve just had our first notice come home about a possible outbreak due to kid’s sharing batting helmets.  Because of that “lice-changing” experience (sorry, I just can’t help myself) we lived through several year’s ago I feel better equipped with how to eliminate them if God-forbid we are ever plagued again.  And although it’s not a topic I care to discuss freely at cocktail parties, if I can help preserve the sanity of even one family, my work “hair” is done!