Catholic Adoptive Parenting Columnist Heidi Hess Saxton
Catholic Mom Columns
After a week of "vacation" -- visiting relatives with two children and no
husband -- I am back, more than ready to settle in and not go ANYWHERE for a
millennia or so.
Of course, it's not a real vacation with two small children clutching at
one's thigh, unwilling to let go even in their sleep in the offhand chance
that Mommy might go somewhere REALLY FAR AWAY (like the bathroom) without
Ah, it's an exotic life I lead, folks.
The six year old is especially puzzling. If he is in his room playing, every
ten minutes (give or take a minute) he will appear at the top of the stairs
and shout: "Mom! Moooooooooooom!"
(pause.) "I love you..."
"Yes, Christopher, I'm still here. Go play."
Every twenty minutes, he will actually bound down the stairs into the
kitchen or my bedroom or wherever else I am and say, "Hey! Did you MISS ME?"
Now is not the time for the unvarnished truth. “Oh, yes, Christopher,” I hug
Interestingly, my sister Chris said that it was Sarah who carried on the
loudest and longest the time I went to the drug store for twenty minutes
unescorted. (THAT was my vacation.) "I don't get it..." she said. "You've
had her since she was six months old. In every other respect, she is a
confident little girl. What's the screaming about?"
Well, two things, I'm guessing: She has an older brother who is freaking
out, and so she thinks she should get in on the action. And second, she
never misses an opportunity to exercise those lungs – or her inner drama
We cut out of my sister's house a day early -- my nerves were shot, and the
kids' behavior was degenerating more rapidly than a snowman in Hades. I
hated that -- my sister is one of my favorite people. But because I'm one of
hers, she didn't hold it against me.
Cause that's what family does... They stick together, no matter what. Right?
Finding the Right Spot: When Kids Can't Live With Their Parents,
by Janice Levy (Magination Press, 2004).
Kids who can't live with their parents -- both those in foster care,
and those who live with other relatives -- have big feelings. This
book, appropriate for kids 6-12, handles them all with tact and
empathy through the figure of "Aunt Dane," the Mary Poppins of foster
parents. Foster parents will relate to the buxom caregiver, and
wish we had her unflagging optimism and wisdom. In the meantime, we
can learn from her, too.
A special section in the back of the book coaches foster parents on
how to help the children in their care to cope with the realities of
their lives by following Aunt Dane's favorite truisms: "Yesterday is
history, tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift."
|Heidi Hess Saxton and her husband
Craig are adoptive parents of two children
Christopher (6) and Sarah (4).
the editor of Canticle
magazine, the “voice” of "Women of Grace".
A convert to the faith since 1994, Heidi is also a graduate student of
theology at Sacred Heart Major Seminary in Detroit, Michigan, and a
frequent contributor to CatholicExchange.com.
Read more of Heidi’s writing through her website
www.christianword.com or visit Heidi's blog
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