I have done a lot of research online about food and eating. The bombardment of information has made me so confused about how to view food. I already had an abnormal relationship with food and skewed body image, but the internet has overpowered my own ability to trust my body. As much as I love learning about health and living it, I no longer enjoy eating. I have been trying to remember what it was like as a toddler and how much fun food could be. I ate when I was hungry, stopped when I was full, and I ate pizza without worrying about the carbs content. Trust is an important quality to work on. It is naturally instilled, but the world quiets the voice God has given us. By not trusting, we second guess ourselves and our abilities.

As toddlers, we kiss our own reflections and love our bodies. We are born with the instincts to trust our bodies and to listen to them. The negativity comes from outside sources as we grow older, such as, the media and other people. We no longer kiss ourselves in the mirror or want everyone to take our picture. Our self confidence and body image are no longer of God. It takes time to regain the natural state of love that God made us with. God created us in His image and we should try to see Him in ourselves and others.

There is an inner calling inside each of us that can only be filled by God's love. We may fill it with food, control, or other vices, but it is still there gnawing at us. God loves us the way He made us. God is our Father and it is okay to go to Him as a child would. He wants us to trust Him. As I trust my body more, and the world less, I hope that I will be able to trust God and the people I love more as well. Maybe I will even begin to love the body God gave me. Food is meant for nourishment as well as enjoyment. Even Jesus enjoyed eating and drinking. On this journey to find myself as a child, I hope to find an image of myself through God's eyes. How do you see yourself compared to how God made you?

Copyright 2014 Tanya Weitzel

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