“What is your opinion? A man had two sons. He came to the first and said, ‘Son, go out and work in the vineyard today.’He said in reply, “I will not,” but afterwards he changed his mind and went. (Matthew 21:28-29)
For years I said, “I will not.”
Well, I never actually said, “I will not.” More like – I am not ready or I am not sure or I think I will hang around the vineyard gate.
I liked God. I was pretty close to him when I was a child. But as I got older, other things took precedence. I prayed to him once in awhile, when I needed something. But there was little worship. No daily prayer. No scripture.
Then I changed my mind.
I will always remember that day, sitting at Mass, with my husband and 2 little boys, suddenly knowing that it was time to commit. I wanted to become Catholic.
To me at the time, it seemed to come out of the blue. But looking back, I can see that there was a lot that happened that led up to that day.
I often feel sad about those days when I did not know God. When I did not worship God. When I did not make Him the Lord of my life.
But then I think about people like St. Augustine. Look at his late conversion and what became of him! “Late have I loved you, O Beauty, ever ancient, ever new."
Look at Paul. Saint Paul.
Maybe some of us have to be later than others. And was I really late?
I have known God in some way all of my life. I have no doubt that he has always been with me. Even when I was avoiding him.
But it seems to me that my whole life has been headed in the same direction – towards God. I know I have made some detours, but God writes straight with crooked lines.
So here I am.
Was I late? Or was I on time?
Does it matter as long as I am with Him now?
God is still calling me into the vineyard. He is calling all of us - with ministries and sacrifices and the little everyday conversions that happen in our lives of faith.
I still avoid those things that scare me a little. I still often say No.
But I hang around that vineyard gate and then I change my mind again.
Praise our God of Second Chances.
Copyright 2015 Colleen Spiro
Photography: Crooked_Walkway by Ladyheart 2007, morgueFile free photo
About the Author
Colleen Spiro is a Catholic mother, grandmother and a deacon’s wife. A certified spiritual director, Colleen loves to share her faith and encourage others through her retreats and writings. You can read her reflections at her website, Catholic Prayer Life and read or listen to her podcast at Finding God in the Everyday.