--- title: This is Gonna Hurt description: "Fear is not always born from a lack of trust. Sometimes it comes from past experience and future concerns. This is when Mary Lou Rosien knows God is telling her, \"This is gonna hurt.\"" --- [![catholic-mom-logo-v2](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/images/catholic-mom-logo-v2.svg "catholic-mom-logo-v2")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) [![search-icon](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/search-icon.svg)](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2016/04/01/this-is-gonna-hurt#) # This is Gonna Hurt Apr 1, 2016 1:30:11 PM  |  by [Mary Lou Rosien](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/mary-lou-rosien) ![Freeimages/SilvioMechow](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/Imported_Blog_Media/image-550x366.jpg?width=550&height=366&name=image-550x366.jpg) Freeimages/SilvioMechow I had confessed it over and over again; the spirit of pride and control that seemed to rule my heart. I was overwhelmed about many things: family life, new challenges and even the election and I found myself asking the Lord for specific ways to sort it all out. Then, I caught myself! * "Stop telling God how to work,"* I scolded myself. *"Why am I so controlling?"* It hit me. I didn't really want control; I was afraid. Actually, terrified may be a better way to describe what I was feeling. I started to look at my pattern of (what I had thought) was control. Something difficult would be on the horizon and I would feel that if I prayed for a specific solution, perhaps the I would be spared the pain of that difficulty. I didn't really want to control anything, but the pain that was fast approaching. I was just **afraid**. Often we hear the fear is a lack of trust in God, but I don't think this is always true. I have lived long enough to understand that God is in control. He has a plan that is much better than the one I have envisioned and He will fulfill His promise to make good from all things for those who trust in Him. What I was experiencing was a fear of knowing that sometimes God allows quite a lot of pain before the change comes. It's more like the labor pains with your second child, that moment you think to yourself, "Oh, I forgot it was gonna hurt like this. I'm scared to go through this again, but I trust I will have a beautiful baby at the end and I know it's worth it." *Trust doesn't always spare us from fear. * My husband, a physician, likes to remind me that fear can be healthy. Fear helps us to stay alert, to focus on the big picture and even helps us to avoid making mistakes over and over again. One pain that I often suffer, is when I try to reconcile situations that are not healthy for me. It wasn't until a priest pointed out to me in Confession that being a good Christian and showing charity, doesn't mean putting myself in a threatening (dangerous) position repeatedly. He became quite firm with me, "How many times are you going to touch that stove to see if you will still get burned?" He questioned. In retrospect, I wonder if he would have been amused had I answered, "Seven times seventy." Maybe not, still, his point was well taken. A spirit of fear is still something I need to overcome, no matter how legitimate it may seem. Jesus was afraid of what He would endure (as he prayed in the Garden of Gethsemene) prior to His Passion, however, He found the courage to accept God's will. Perhaps, Jesus trusted, not that the, "cup would pass," but that the Father would give Him the strength to endure the coming pain. *This* is the trust that I need to develop. Gary Zimak, author of ***[A Worrier's Guide To The Bible](http://www.amazon.com/o/ASIN/0764821636/catholicmom)***, *[**Listen To Your Blessed Mother**](http://www.amazon.com/o/ASIN/0764823752/catholicmom),* *[**From Fear To Faith**](http://www.amazon.com/o/ASIN/0764824929/catholicmom), *and* [****Faith*, Hope, And Clarity*!**](http://www.amazon.com/o/ASIN/1616368845/catholicmom) *says, > "The good news is that everything doesn't depend on me and there are some things beyond my control. God is in charge and accepting that always brings me great peace. I have learned to do my best and let God do the rest!" Sometimes, God is going to say to me, "This is gonna hurt." I will accept that. I too will work on trusting God as I walk through the valley, not just in trusting Him with the end result: reaching the mountain. *Copyright 2016 Mary Lou Rosien* ### Share this article [![Share on Facebook](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/facebook-24x24.png)](http://www.facebook.com/share.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2016%2F04%2F01%2Fthis-is-gonna-hurt%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dfacebook) [![Share on Twitter](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/twitter-24x24.png)](https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?original_referer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2016%2F04%2F01%2Fthis-is-gonna-hurt%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2016%2F04%2F01%2Fthis-is-gonna-hurt%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&source=tweetbutton&text=This%20is%20Gonna%20Hurt) [![Share on Email](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/email-24x24.png)](mailto:?subject=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2016%2F04%2F01%2Fthis-is-gonna-hurt%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail%20&body=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2016%2F04%2F01%2Fthis-is-gonna-hurt%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail) ** #### About the Author ![Mary Lou Rosien](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/Contributors/MARY%20LOU%20ROSIEN.png) ### [Mary Lou Rosien](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/mary-lou-rosien) Mary Lou Rosien is a Catholic wife, mom to seven, educator, writer, and speaker. She is the author of several books including *[Three Things Divorced Catholics need to Know](https://osv.com/Shop/Product?ProductCode=T1860)* and *The Joy-Filled Broken Heart*. She is known for her love of all things cooking and baking, especially “Friday cookies.” Visit her at [CatholicFamilyBootCamp.com](http://www.catholicfamilybootcamp.com). ## Related Blog Articles [ Does the Devil Make Us Do It? Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2014/07/04/does-the-devil-make-us-do-it) [ Understanding His Delight Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/understanding-his-delight) [ Iranian Muslim helps save Catholic Christian family Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2015/07/02/iranian-muslim-helps-save-catholic-christian-family) ## Comments ## Donate now [![Support Catholic Mom](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545) [![CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png?width=1806&height=731&name=CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png "CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) ##### Subscribe to Catholic Momcast on iTunes or Spotify [![itunes-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/itunes-logo-black.svg)](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/catholic-momcast/id1362352357)[![spotify-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/spotify-logo-black.svg)](https://open.spotify.com/show/15CoipHL7z61IDcYErV0b8?si=hqaQJSxDQgq7S1hxCwsoxQ) ##### CatholicMom on Social Networks [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) ##### About Catholic Mom [Who We Are](https://www.catholicmom.com/about-us) [Contact Us](https://www.catholicmom.com/contact) [Support CatholicMom.com](https://www.catholicmom.com/support-us)   ##### Associated Links [Holy Cross Family Ministries](https://www.hcfm.org/) [Family Rosary](https://www.familyrosary.org/) [Family Theater Productions](https://www.familytheater.org/) [Congregation of the Holy Cross](https://www.holycrossusa.org/) [Father Patrick Peyton, C.S.C.](https://www.fatherpeyton.org/) [The Peyton Institute for Domestic Church Life](https://www.peytonfamilyinstitute.org/) ### **Stay connected!** Don’t miss a thing! 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