--- title: "Lent: It's not all about me" description: How’s your Lent going so far? AnneMarie Miller encourages us to take our focus off of ourselves and place it back on God. image: https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/not-about-me-f.jpg --- [![catholic-mom-logo-v2](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/images/catholic-mom-logo-v2.svg "catholic-mom-logo-v2")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) [![search-icon](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/search-icon.svg)](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2019/04/01/lent-its-not-all-about-me/#) # Lent: It's not all about me Apr 1, 2019 5:00:31 PM  |  by [AnneMarie Miller](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/annemarie-miller) ![featured image](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/not-about-me-f.jpg) [!["Lent: It's not all about me" by AnneMarie Miller (CatholicMom.com)](http://catholicmom.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/not-about-me.jpg)](http://catholicmom.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/not-about-me.jpg) Image credit: [Pixabay.com](https://www.catholicteacher.com/a-holy-week-meditation/) (2017), CC0/PD[/caption] “How’s your Lent going?” This seems like *the* Catholic Conversation Starter in the weeks before Easter. When we’re on the receiving end, we may frantically rack our brain and spiritual life (or non-existent spiritual life) as we try to quickly craft an answer to this question before we can fire back a “So how’s *your* Lent going?” Examining our Lenten journey can be beneficial. I personally enjoy this exercise. I figure out what works, what isn’t working, and those things that I really *want* to do, but that I’ve mostly forgotten about. I enthusiastically revise my “Lenten plan” as needed and launch headlong into the final days before the celebration of Christ’s Resurrection. As I go down the list of what I’ve been doing for Lent, I often pay attention to the effects that these practices are having on my life. After all, I don’t want to make my Lenten sacrifice “everyone else’s” by doing things that make me cranky! However, while this process can be good, it can grow into a stumbling block for me. I begin to see my “Lenten plan” primarily in terms of what it’s doing *for me*. I become deeply focused on the visible fruits and positive effects that I can notice and quantify. My “Lenten plan” becomes one big checklist for self-improvement instead of holiness. Rather than directing my gaze to *God -- *and what *God wants -- *I make Lent all about me. In fact, there have been several times when I have chosen Lenten practices simply because they were quirky, exciting, or something that *I* thought would be cool. There’s nothing inherently wrong with creating a quirky Lenten penance, but there *is* a problem when the penances and prayers I say revolve around myself and what *I* want. I love seeing results. Observing visible progress--whether I’m going through a spiritual crisis or personal counseling -- is very motivating for me. But, I’m discovering that this Lent, I need to remind myself that *it’s not about what I can see.* Lenten practices are not about what I can quantify; they are about drawing close to our suffering Savior and becoming more like him. I may not witness benefits from saying certain prayers or offering sacrifices, but these prayers and sacrifices are still worth doing. My pursuit of holiness should not be about how many conversions I witness or how often I feel pious. As I meander through this season, I find myself thinking about the quote from [St. Josemaría Escrivá](http://www.escrivaworks.org/book/the_forge-chapter-8.htm) that adorned my bedroom wall when I was a teenager: “The apostle has no aim other than letting God work, making himself available.” I don’t need to focus on how many fruits are (or are not) becoming visible to my eyes. I don’t need to put “make this Lent personally meaningful” as my top priority. Instead, I need to remember St. Josemaría’s advice. I need to make myself available to God, and not worry about the results. God’s got it all taken care of. --- *Copyright 2019 AnneMarie Miller* ### Share this article [![Share on Facebook](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/facebook-24x24.png)](http://www.facebook.com/share.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2019%2F04%2F01%2Flent-its-not-all-about-me%2F%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dfacebook) [![Share on Twitter](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/twitter-24x24.png)](https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?original_referer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2019%2F04%2F01%2Flent-its-not-all-about-me%2F%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2019%2F04%2F01%2Flent-its-not-all-about-me%2F%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&source=tweetbutton&text=Lent%3A%20It%27s%20not%20all%20about%20me) [![Share on Email](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/email-24x24.png)](mailto:?subject=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2019%2F04%2F01%2Flent-its-not-all-about-me%2F%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail%20&body=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2019%2F04%2F01%2Flent-its-not-all-about-me%2F%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail) ** #### About the Author ![AnneMarie Miller](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/Contriubutors/ANNEMARIE%20MILLER.jpeg) ### [AnneMarie Miller](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/annemarie-miller) A bibliophile, wife, mother of young children, and lover of the Liturgy, AnneMarie Miller enjoys exploring the manifold—and quirky—ways in which God speaks. She can often be found reading books to her kids, burrowing her toes in the red Oklahoma dirt, or sipping black coffee. Her reflections on Catholicism, literature, and hope can be found on her blog, [Sacrifice of Love](http://marianninja.blogspot.com). ## Related Blog Articles [ The 6 Words We Can All Pray this Lent Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2019/03/04/the-6-words-we-can-all-pray-this-lent/) [ Lenten Plans and Goals Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2018/02/05/lenten-plans-goals/) [ It’s OK to be Unoriginal This Lent Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2020/03/02/its-ok-to-be-unoriginal-this-lent/) ## Comments ## Donate now [![Support Catholic Mom](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545) [![CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png?width=1806&height=731&name=CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png "CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) ##### Subscribe to Catholic Momcast on iTunes or Spotify [![itunes-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/itunes-logo-black.svg)](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/catholic-momcast/id1362352357)[![spotify-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/spotify-logo-black.svg)](https://open.spotify.com/show/15CoipHL7z61IDcYErV0b8?si=hqaQJSxDQgq7S1hxCwsoxQ) ##### CatholicMom on Social Networks [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) ##### About Catholic Mom [Who We Are](https://www.catholicmom.com/about-us) [Contact Us](https://www.catholicmom.com/contact) [Support CatholicMom.com](https://www.catholicmom.com/support-us)   ##### Associated Links [Holy Cross Family Ministries](https://www.hcfm.org/) [Family Rosary](https://www.familyrosary.org/) [Family Theater Productions](https://www.familytheater.org/) [Congregation of the Holy Cross](https://www.holycrossusa.org/) [Father Patrick Peyton, C.S.C.](https://www.fatherpeyton.org/) [The Peyton Institute for Domestic Church Life](https://www.peytonfamilyinstitute.org/) ### **Stay connected!** Don’t miss a thing! 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