I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you. (Psalm 32:8) Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. (Proverbs 3:5)God has been nothing but trustworthy and patient with me all these years. Yet, I continue to be fearful of the future and often paralyzed by the unknown. It is a constant struggle between what I think is best and what He knows to be best. This is going to be a tough school year for me. There’s just no way around it. My oldest is in his senior year and college is the topic of conversation. The thought of him turning eighteen and planning the next stage of his life has my heart unsettled like never before. It’s the oldest cliche in the book, but I honestly don’t know where the time has gone. I could swear just yesterday I was dropping him for his first day of preschool. How am I to make peace with the monumental change that awaits me? I want there to be an easy answer, but I know the only answer is to continue to put one foot in front of the other and trust. Trust in His promise that He’s got it all figured out, not only for me and my life but for my children -- each one owning such a big piece of my heart. I need to find the joy in each day and keep the future in His very capable hands. I’m not gonna lie. If I was offered the opportunity to peek at a snapshot of my life in another twenty years, I’d be tempted to do so. Will there be daughters-in-law in the photo? Grandchildren? How will we all look? Healthy and well? Do I still have a head full of hair? (a legit concern at the rate it's falling out these days.) Am I wrinkled and happy or have I let the stress of my first-world problems beat me down? Without God in my life, I would absolutely want to know. With God in my life, I understand I really don’t need to.
Copyright 2019 Nicole Johnson
About the Author
Nicole and her husband have been blessed with three children. Nicole markets the mission of a non-profit that provides early therapies for children diagnosed with developmental delays. She and her husband serve on the board for the New England chapter of Bethany Christian Services, a national adoption agency. Nicole's family advocates for life, adoption, and embracing children with special needs. Visit her blog at Joy in the Journey.