'Bless Me, Father, for I Have Sinned'

Do you cringe when you think of going to Confession? Bonnie Drury hopes to ease your anxiety.

I’ve been trying to go to Confession more often, mostly because our priest urges his parishioners to go every month. I told him I was trying to take his advice, and he said, “Don’t make me the reason. Do it for the graces you receive. You never know when it’s your last day.”

He was reminding me of our goal to be in the state of grace when we die. But we also want to be in the state of grace every time we partake of the Eucharist, that great gift of Jesus Christ Himself.

Examination of Conscience

I don’t think I actually dread the Sacrament of Penance, but I do tend to put it off. I tell myself I’m doing okay, not really sinning, and certainly have no mortal sins to confess. But when I go through any of the Examinations of Conscience available online, I see bad habits that could sneak up on me and become serious sins.

What a great reminder to learn how to work on these bad habits before they lead me away from Our Lord. I have a tendency to avoid my neighbors in our very close condo community, instead of reaching out to those who might be lonely souls. This is just one of the bad habits I need to work on to become more holy. “Love your neighbor as yourself,” Jesus says (Mark 12:31).

Words of Absolution

Another reason we Catholics go to Confession is to hear the words of absolution from our priest, the representative of Christ. We are a sensate species. God had this in mind when He initiated the Sacraments. We can see the priest’s gesture of blessing and hear the words.

I remember when my son, Rick, was getting ready for his first Confession as preparation for First Holy Communion. He was so nervous, he was trembling. I tried to reassure him. “Father knows it’s your first time. He will help you through it.” I felt like I was sending him off to the guillotine when he walked away.

A few minutes later, he came out of the confessional with a great big grin on his face. “That felt good!”

I realized that I feel good too, when I’m finished and Father pronounces the absolution. It’s a clean slate. Will I fail again? Undoubtedly. This is why frequent Confession is so important: to give us that gift of grace that will carry us through our daily lives. I’ve grown closer to our priest through the Sacrament of Penance. He never judges, but is a conduit to God’s mercy and forgiveness.

Preparation for the Sacrament

I like to go early, to be first in line. It gives me a half-hour in the stillness of the church to say my prayers and to prepare my soul. Jesus felt it was important enough to bestow this authority to His Apostles, right after the Resurrection.

“Whose sins you forgive are forgiven them, and whose sins you retain are retained.” (John 20:23)

Yes, we can go to God directly, anytime and with anything, but He gave us this special way to confess for a reason: the grace, the kindly advice, encouragement from His priests, and the words of absolution. Do not be overcome with trepidation, but with gratitude that He established this Sacrament for our benefit.

I’ll see you in line at the confessional, and we’ll rejoice afterward. God bless.

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Copyright 2026 Bonnie Drury
Images: (top, center) Canva; (bottom) iStockPhoto.com, licensed for use by Holy Cross Family Ministries