'Butter': An Eye-Opening Movie for Parents

Barb Szyszkiewicz reviews an upcoming film that deals head-on with bullying and teen suicide.

The movie BUTTER, releasing today in theaters, probably wasn't intended for an audience of parents. But after viewing this movie along with my 21-year-old neighbor (whom I've known since she was born and whose opinion I trust) I concluded, and she agreed, that parents are the ones who need to watch it. Teens hear a lot about suicide prevention and mental health issues through their schools, but the pandemic has severely reduced parents' opportunities to come together with other parents and share resources.

Parental isolation—from their own teenager—is a major contributing factor to Butter's predicament. And I believe that parental isolation from other parents doesn't serve us or our children, as well.

Synopsis

Butter is a smart, funny high school junior who happens to be obese. But he secretly befriends the prettiest girl in school via social media by pretending to be a jock from another school. As Butter struggles with bullying and self-esteem at school, he plans an incredible social media stunt that will risk his life but win him attention and popularity – but as the day approaches can he really go through with it? (courtesy of Blue Fox Entertaiment)

Butter, a gifted musician, decides that he'll get revenge on his classmates by getting their attention in a drastic way: he sets up a website advertising his plans for Butter's Final Meal, to take place on New Year's Eve. Viewers are encouraged to help him choose the perfect menu: a menu that will allow him to eat himself to death. He begins to enjoy his newfound popularity, though some bullies insist he's not courageous enough to actually kill himself. As attention to his website grows and he finds himself the new darling of the most popular crowd, Butter discovers that he's losing his appetite for food.

It seems like things might turn around for Butter, until New Year's Eve rolls around and he finds himself publicly rejected by the girl he secretly loves. And that's when he decides that he really will go through with his plan.

"I didn't want to die. I just wanted the unbearable pain to go away."

With scenes involving bullying (both physical and psychological) and a very intense, utterly silent, webcast of Butter's final meal, plus underage drinking, dangerous behaviors, and crude language, this movie, though PG-13, isn't something I'd recommend for viewers who are not yet in high school.

I would, however, recommend this movie to parents whose children are in middle school or high school, even though it's hard to watch. As I mentioned at the top of the article, Butter is not only alienated from the other students in his school (his only friend is homeschooled and plans to move out of state soon), but also from his parents. His father will hardly even look at him, and a big part of Butter's lack of self-esteem stems from that. His mother overcompensates by babying him, preparing beautiful but high-calorie, high-fat meals for him, and lying about his diet at medical appointments—in general, endangering his physical health. "Mothers worry more than anyone," she tells Butter at one point, but all her worrying only enables his habits of binge eating and comfort eating.

Parents should check out, and refer their teens to, the section of the movie's website called R U OK? This page is packed with info about crisis helplines for anyone who is in crisis or knows someone who is. There's also a list of warning signs of suicide, risk factors, and steps that friends, classmates, and family members can take to help someone in emotional pain. The page includes more than 20 outreach videos to give concerned friends and family members the tools they need to help someone else.

Find out more about BUTTER, and where you can see it, at ButtersFinalMeal.com.

Butter movie poster