Discerning Schooling Choices as Catholic Families

Amelia Bentrup shares tips and thoughts on discerning educational choices and shares her experience with making a major change. 

It’s that time of year when many families are discerning their schooling choices and options for the next school year. For some families, this path seems easy. They made a decision when their children were young and it is working for them. They are happy with their current schooling choice, whether that is homeschooling, Catholic school or public school. Their children are all thriving and growing and learning. If that is you, wonderful! Keep doing what is working well for you!

However, maybe things aren’t working so well this year. Maybe you are discerning a different choice for next year. Or maybe your oldest will be kindergarten age, and you are discerning how to start.

This past school year, our family made a major educational change for some of our children. My oldest two children were homeschooled straight through high school and then went off to college. However, this past year, our family moved 45 minutes away and our youngest three children started at a classical Catholic school. We are now seven months into the school year, and I am very confident we made the right decision. However, I am equally confident that homeschooling was the right choice for us earlier.

As someone who made a major schooling change, here are some tips for families discerning schooling options or a change in schooling choice.

Pray, Pray, Pray

The first step of course is to pray. Spend time in Adoration or in front of the Blessed Sacrament.

Pray to Saint Joseph to guide your family. Saint Thomas Aquinas, Saint Joseph of Cupertino, and Saint Elizabeth Ann Seton are saints frequently associated with schooling and education. Make friends with them and ask them to be your guide.

Be Honest

Be honest about why you chose a particular schooling choice in the first place or what draws you to it and honestly think about whether circumstances that led to that choice have changed at all. Are you being called to a particular schooling choice, or do you believe that is the only way or the right way to raise holy Catholic children? When I was really honest with myself, I realized that our family’s decision to homeschool came from a place of fear and that I believed homeschooling was the best way to raise holy, Catholic children.

While part of that was my concern about the influences my children would be exposed to in school, my biggest fear was who I would be as a mother without homeschooling. All my friends were homeschoolers. Homeschoolers were my community. I was terrified to give that up. I found, though, that the amazing Catholic school my children now attend also has a wonderful community. And while my days look very different than they used to, different is good.

Homeschooling worked well for us when my children were younger. I loved our days at home and spending so much time with them. When I had younger children who needed me at home, there was a certain wonderfulness about spending so much time together and cementing sibling relationships. We could do things all together.

However, as my children got older, things got more fragmented. Older children have different needs than younger children, both academically and socially. Family dynamics change as the youngest baby grows up and is no longer a baby. I discerned God is calling me to serve Him in a different way as my children no longer needed me at home so intensely. While my family will always be my number one priority, I now have the time to pursue additional education and the career I put off when my children were younger.

Hard is Not Necessarily Bad

Another thing I have come to realize is that hard is not necessarily bad. God does not call us to the easy way. Following Christ is not easy. All schooling choices are hard. Homeschooling is hard. Putting your kids in school is hard. Dealing with homework and early mornings is hard. Feeling lonely or isolated is hard. Helping a struggling reader or reluctant math learner is hard. Discerning schooling choices involves not running from the hard but running toward the good.

Throughout our change from homeschooling to Catholic school, there have been many moments when I have been tempted to throw in the towel, such as when my youngest child was dealing with anxiety and stress over tests and assessments or when my middle-schooler seemed to spend a lot of after-school time on homework.

But I have come to realize that hard is not bad. Learning how to deal with anxiety and stress is an important life skill. Learning to manage time and projects is necessary. My children and I needed to be stretched a bit, and it has been good for them and us.

Start with What is Reasonable

Start your discernment process by thinking about what is reasonable. What schooling options are reasonable for your family? Homeschooling may not be reasonable if your family relies on two incomes. What schools are available to your family? A particular school may not be reasonable if it is too far away from your house or is unaffordable. If your children have special needs, then certain schools may not have the necessary resources or be able to accommodate them.

Explore all options. Are there scholarships, vouchers or other programs that can help pay for private school? What resources do you have for homeschooling? What co-ops and support groups are in your area?

Just Try It

One of the hardest things about discerning schooling choices is you really don’t know how a particular schooling choice or school will work for your family until you try it. And a schooling choice feels like a year-long commitment, but it doesn’t have to be. It is okay to pull a child out of school to homeschool in the middle of the year. It is also okay for a child to start school mid-year. It is okay for a child to switch schools mid-year if things really aren’t working. Of course, these are major decisions and would cause some upheaval in life, but they aren’t off the table.

If you are discerning homeschooling, try it over the summer. Start with building that routine, looking at curriculum and maybe trying to get together with other homeschoolers to gauge what the next school year might look like.

It is a bit harder to try out school, but if you enroll, knowing you can always change your mind takes some of the pressure off. And whatever choice you make, be sure to give adequate time to allow your children and the family to adjust. I would say it took about 3 to 4 weeks for all my kids to start to adjust to being in school after being homeschooled for so long, and several months to fully adjust, but now they are all thriving.

Whatever educational choice you make for the next school year, as long as you pray and honestly try to follow God’s will, be confident in His guidance and love and know you can always change course if necessary.

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Copyright 2026 Amelia Bentrup
Images: Canva