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After a time of feeling detached and disconnected, Carol S. Bannon had a moment of consolation that revealed a beautiful truth about the Eucharist.


There can be no more beautiful sight than seeing the doorway into God’s realm opening for us after our journey here on Earth is done. For many years I prayed I would be found worthy to walk through those doors, seeing all God has promised. 

What eye has not seen, and ear has not heard, and what has not entered the human heart, what God has prepared for those who love him. (1 Corinthians 2:9)

 

And I do love Him!

 

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Lately though I have felt like a bare branch amidst a full-grown tree, attached, but separate. I have felt alone, even when among friends and family. Some days I can’t seem to slow down because something always has to be taken care of immediately. I can blame family issues, stress, and/or illness; the list of excuses is legendary but after 45 years of marriage, this is my normal.

Seldom have I ever questioned if God was tuning me out.

Then I stopped and questioned my actions and motives. Am I really present before God when I attend Mass? Is God being honored when my mind and spirit are spinning with other matters? Is showing up enough? For that matter is saying my daily prayers really talking and listening to God? So I began praying for a longer attention span, one lasting longer than a few minutes before my mind began wandering off with ‘what ifs’, ‘maybe if I do this’, and ‘why did I ever say that’ realms. Patience has never been my virtue, though, and even knowing the importance of honoring God both through prayers and the Mass, I could not settle!

Then I realized maybe I was tuning God out by talking too much and not listening.

And the day I consciously stopped repeating specific prayers was the same day I opened the Bible to the quote:

“No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John14:6)

 

Every Catholic knows the only way into Heaven is through Christ whom we receive in the Eucharist. But it was after the prayer for peace, when my pastor walked over to the tabernacle, slowly opening the doors, that it all came together for me: those doors are leading me, are leading all of us, to Heaven.

 

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Those tabernacle doors are leading me, are leading all of us, to Heaven. #catholicmom

 

I have been a Catholic my entire life and every Mass I have attended throughout the years I have had Heaven’s gates right in front of me the whole time. At this moment, after months of feeling apart, I became aware only of Him. Everything else faded away. I could not take my eyes away from where Christ resided. Humbled and infused with so much love, all I could do was stare at those doors and utter in prayer “Thank you God.”

We are given the gift of Heaven through Christ. He alone is the key, the One who will judge us worthy to enter. Allow your eyes to watch Heaven’s doors open often through the gift of our Holy Mass, to settle into full Communion with Christ. Perseverance, patience, and prayer will truly lead us all into the fullness of His Love.

 

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Copyright 2022 Carol Sbordon Bannon
Images: Tree photo copyright 2022 Carol Sbordon Bannon, all rights reserved. All others Canva.