How Emotional Intelligence Transforms Motherhood

Marge Steinhage Fenelon details five simple, faith-inspired ways moms can grow in emotional intelligence.

Motherhood truly is a beautiful journey full of blessings, new lessons, and the occasional sleepless night. As Catholic moms, we’re lovingly called to grow in emotional intelligence as a way to stay grounded in our faith and embrace the joyful, sometimes messy realities of family life. When things get tough, leaning on the Holy Spirit helps us see our challenges with fresh eyes and keeps discouragement at bay. With hope and perseverance, we shine Christ’s love into our homes, encouraging our kids to trust in God and keep going, even when life gets bumpy. 

What Is Emotional Intelligence? A Look at Science 

Emotional intelligence, often called EQ, is our ability to recognize, understand, and manage our own emotions — and to relate to the feelings of others in a healthy way. Psychologists explain that EQ involves self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills. Studies show that people with strong emotional intelligence tend to handle stress better, build deeper relationships, and enjoy even greater well-being.  

Science suggests that EQ isn’t fixed. We can grow it at any age by practicing self-awareness, listening actively, and reflecting on our experiences. For us as mothers, nurturing emotional intelligence is a gift we give to ourselves, our children, and our whole family. 

A Catholic Mother’s Example: Guiding with Grace 

Imagine a Catholic mother of two facing a stressful morning before school. The youngest daughter bursts into tears over a missing favorite sweater. Instead of responding with impatience or dismissing the child’s feelings, the mother pauses and silently asks the Holy Spirit for patience. She kneels, meets her daughter at eye level, and gently acknowledges, “I can see you’re upset about your sweater. It’s hard when something important is missing.”  

She hugs her daughter, reassures her of her love, and together they search for the sweater. Even though the sweater remains lost, the girl calms down, feeling heard and understood. Later, the mother encourages her daughter to say a small prayer to ask Saint Anthony for help. Through this simple moment, the mother models empathy, self-control, and turning to faith in challenges: planting seeds of emotional intelligence and trust in God. 

Five Simple Ways to Grow Emotional Intelligence in Faith 

Pause and Pray  

Take a few gentle moments each day for prayer and reflection. Notice how you’re feeling and invite the Holy Spirit to gently guide your heart as you journey through motherhood. 

Model Virtuous Emotional Expression 

Let your kids see you express joy, tears, and even stress, always rooted in faith. Share how prayer gives you strength and peace in tough times. 

Listen with Love 

When your child wants to talk, give them your whole heart. Listen closely, affirm their feelings, and let them know you care — just as Jesus listens to us. 

Find Support 

Reach out to fellow Catholic moms, join parish groups, or talk with a spiritual mentor. And remember, our Blessed Mother is always ready to be a loving source of comfort and encouragement. 

Reflect and Surrender 

After a challenging moment, take time to reflect and pray about what happened. Ask our Lord for wisdom and a gentle spirit as you learn and grow. 

Emotional Intelligence Inspired by Grace 

Motherhood will always have its surprises, but with emotional intelligence and faith as our guides, we can meet each new day with kindness, courage, and a greater sense of peace. As we nurture our families and ourselves, we’re wrapped in God’s love: walking together, growing together, and discovering joy along the way. 

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Copyright 2025 Marge Steinhage Fenelon
Images: Canva