Invisible Strings

Kristina Talbot reflects on how to shift our family's time and attention toward the good.

As parents, we are pulled in so many different directions. Don’t miss signup for the fall festival, did you turn in the coaching fee for that team, the deadline is tomorrow for the field trip, and don’t forget picture day. The mental load is vast, but so is the pressure. Have your kids involved; don’t give them too much free time. It can be overwhelming to try to keep up, and the more I go along the more I’m realizing that I can’t actually keep up. It is all too much.

There are any number of strings pulling us and our children away from home, away from each other. Recently, I’ve started to ask the question, "What is this pulling us toward?” If the answer is away from each other and toward something that doesn’t serve the health and well-being of our family, then the commitment is reevaluated. Here’s the thing: It’s not always something negative, sometimes it’s just that it is one thing too many for our family or that child.

This past weekend, I took my boys out of town to my hometown where there was endless time outside fishing and enjoying time on the water. It was glorious and simple. As I soaked in the goodness, I also reflected on our family obligations for the fall and the relationships my boys are developing and cultivating with different friends.

Taking Time to Evaluate Your Family’s Commitments and Needs

Kids all grow at different rates, but we now live in an age where parental philosophy shapes the rate of growth in some very specific areas — especially in terms of internet, gaming, and online access. As we navigate middle school and high school, there has become a divide between kids who can still be goofy and kids who engage in, let’s just say, more adult humor. These nuances become less subtle as adolescence progress; the struggle to fit in while embracing our family’s different path can be disheartening.

Technology remains a string that ties us to our way of life at this point. Fortunately, as time goes on, we are learning more and more about the impact of technology upon our children’s growth, and even the tech giants are taking note with more and increasingly user-friendly parental oversight settings. But the reality I have seen through the years is that no matter how vigilant a parent is, there are always access points for our children and multiple strings pulling them into a web they may or may not be equipped to handle. All of this is accelerating the growth process in a manner families are struggling to navigate. And yet, our Lord offers us refuge that can often be found in our backyards or places He created for us.

Because you have the Lord for your refuge and have made the Most High your stronghold, no evil shall befall you. (Psalm 91:9-10a)

As I watched my kids kayak and fish while they entertained themselves by knocking each other off kayaks occasionally, I marveled at not only their delight, but also my peace in simply monitoring basic safety. As I felt the relief of my physiological system calm, I realized that it’s not just them being pulled in too many directions: We all are. But what can be done? How do we move in a different direction?

6 Quick Ways to Shift Our Family Time

• Spend more time outside
• Provide expanses of time without technology
• Engage in family activities
• Look for opportunities for family members to catch or grow their food when possible
• Review the calendar and offload optional events
• Build in weekly downtime aligned with the sabbath

The excitement of my boys catching fish and crabs to immediately cook up in the kitchen reminded me of the disciples out on the water dropping their nets for a catch. I recognize that we don’t all live near large water sources, but there are often, perhaps annual, opportunities to farm, hunt, or fish part of our meals. This can provide children with a deeper connection to the provisions the Lord provides while also supporting our overall health.

My God will fully supply whatever you need, in accord with his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19)

Taking time away from technology is something that we all need. Our family has evening hours where we place an invisible cord on our phones, and they must stay within a few feet of a designated area. Recalling the days of phones being attached to the wall provides a different containment than having the device as an extension of our hands. But we’ve also learned that it’s not just about turning technology off, it’s also about turning family time on in a way that meets our kids where they are at. That can look different depending on the ages and requires collaboration and involving our kids for ideas.

Finally, evaluating the calendar is an ongoing conversation and process. It is intrinsically good to uphold our commitments, but it also permissible to opt out with reasonable and clear communication when necessary. Sometimes that means we miss a practice because a child is overwhelmed by a project or exhausted from a tournament. And other times, it means declining an invitation to a fun outing so that we can recharge as a family.

As we navigate a world in which so many things compete for our family’s attention, we need only step outside to see a beautiful sunset or catch a glimpse at the stars to remember that the world in which we dwell is made good. There is so much beauty in our midst and so many opportunities to share the splendor among us.

As I traveled back home and felt the tug of our full schedule, I slowed down enough to allow a new string to pull me toward that which God has made for us. That is a direction worth moving toward.

God looked at everything he had made, and found it very good. (Genesis 1:31)

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Copyright 2026 Kristina Talbot
Images: Canva