Life Is Built of Off-Ramps

Kevin Tondra shares how decades of guiding college students and parents taught him that God's plan is rarely limited to a single route.  

Every parent of a young child knows the white-knuckled terror of hearing, "I really have to go!" from the backseat, usually about three minutes after passing a rest stop. Back before smartphone navigation could tell us exactly when we'd arrive, parenting on the road meant offering calm, utterly baseless reassurances.

"Don't worry, honey, there's an off-ramp coming," I'd say, silently praying my AAA map wasn't lying. Usually, knowing there was probably a McDonald's somewhere up ahead was enough to keep everyone from completely losing it on our way to Myrtle Beach.

Funny how parenting doesn't really change once our kids grow up. When they begin making decisions about college, trade school, or careers, they often look at their futures with that same panic. They treat every decision as if it will determine the rest of their lives. If they pick the wrong major or choose a direction that doesn't seem to fit, they feel trapped. But the truth is, life is built of off-ramps.

When the Road Doesn't Go as Planned

God works through our miscalculations. A "wrong turn" doesn't mean we've somehow missed His plan. Sometimes it's simply the off-ramp He uses to teach us patience, humility, or resilience. Whether they switch majors in sophomore year or change careers at 25, the Holy Spirit is just as present on an off-ramp as He is when life seems to be cruising along.

I saw that all-too-familiar panic countless times during my years in higher education. Many equated a change in plans with personal failure. I remember the students who were devastated after being turned down for a master's program in Speech-Language Pathology. When they learned they could pursue a master's degree in Special Education with initial licensure, many later told me that what first felt like a disappointment became the path they were meant to follow.

Then there were the students sitting in my office in tears after hitting a wall in a major they no longer cared about and could no longer continue. Still, their parents kept pushing, convinced the career path was non-negotiable because they were worried about starting salaries, job security, or prestige.

In those moments, I'd invite the parents in for a joint meeting. They would often try to convince me that the major was still the right choice and that their child "could just try harder." I would gently redirect them to stop looking at me and start looking at their son or daughter — and really listen. With a little encouragement, the student would finally find the courage to explain what that pressure was doing to them. More often than not, that honest conversation became the turning point the whole family needed.

More Than One Way Forward

I also encountered students who went to college simply because they felt it was the expected next step after high school. I used to fall into that trap myself. When I graduated from North Canton Hoover High School in 1989, the message I heard was that to amount to anything, you had to earn a college degree.

As I got closer to retirement, my perspective began to shift. Part of my role involved helping administer Early College High School programs, including one at Portage Lakes Career Center, just south of Akron. Working with those high school juniors and seniors in career-tech programs opened my eyes. They were learning skills that could lead directly to meaningful careers after high school.

Seeing that firsthand expanded my perspective. It influenced the choices my own daughters made. Both pursued hands-on careers, and they are doing exceptionally well — making a good living while making a difference in the lives of others.

That experience changed how I viewed the choices young people face. I began to see more clearly that God leads young people in many different directions. For example, I helped guide one engineering student who was considering teaching, and he ultimately pursued an electrical apprenticeship instead.

Some of the most meaningful conversations I had involved students wrestling with a call to ministry — as a Protestant minister, a Catholic priest, or in religious life. Despite what they often described as a nagging, persistent interest, no one had ever told them it was actually okay to explore it.

In those moments, I would help connect them with people who could walk alongside them as they discerned that calling. Often, simply having permission to explore that possibility changed everything.

Looking back, maybe that's why I still think about those frantic road trips. We weren't really looking for an exit. We were looking for hope: proof that we weren't trapped and that relief was just ahead.

Our young adults need that same reassurance. They don't need parents who panic every time the GPS recalculates. They need parents who remind them that God has already accounted for every missed exit, every wrong turn, and every change of plans.

His plans have never depended on us taking the perfect road.

Sometimes His greatest work begins at the next off-ramp.

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Copyright 2026 Kevin Tondra
Images: Canva