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Michelle Hamel writes about trying to have a deeper focus on peace and the true meaning of the upcoming holiday season.


We are on the cusp of one of the most challenging seasons of the year! We moms carry so much of the pressure to make magical holiday memories. There's a lot of list making, menu planning, grocery shopping, baking, cooking, gift buying, and decorating for us to manage until the end of the year. So, how can we create moments of delight while fostering peace, faith, and the true meaning of the holiday season? 

Focus, Pacing, and Heart Posture 

I've been thinking about how to make peace and simplicity a focus of my own Advent this year. That doesn't mean I'm going to cut out all my usual planning and traditions. I think it's more about my overall focus, pacing, and heart posture.  

What's our motivation behind all that we do to make Thanksgiving and Christmas special? The most important motivation for me is to show my family that I love them. And yet, I know there are moments in each holiday season when I lose sight of that, and my actions and reactions can make it seem that my to-do list is more important than the hearts I'm trying to serve well.  

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Sometimes I allow overwhelm to run the show, become too rigid, and try to white-knuckle it through "my" plans instead of being flexible and accepting God's grace to pivot when things don't go as I had hoped. Age and experience have helped release my rigid hold on perfectionism, but it still trips me up from time to time — especially during the holidays. 

I'm noticing an internal desire growing inside of me to create space for quiet as part of my to-do list for the season. Finding a less frenetic pace is important to me. I want to avoid feeling like I'm in a constant state of overwhelm from Thanksgiving to New Year's Day! That constant adrenaline rush might help me get all those extra holiday tasks accomplished, but it leaves me exhausted, burned out, and joyless.  

I don't want to feel like I'm merely surviving or "getting through" the holidays. I want to be able to enter into them and extract any joy and grace that God wishes to give me in this particular year; the only year my children and my grandchildren will be at this particular age. I want to remember that this time is a gift to unfold and unwrap even with all its imperfections.  

Moments and Memories 

I'm thinking about all of our family traditions that create new memories while, at the same time, bring up past memories I want to savor. I find that as I get older, I'm spending more time reflecting on those memories and looking at them from a grown-up perspective. At holidays as a child, I was just excited to see my cousins and play whatever pretend game we came up with in the moment while sneaking black olives to put on our fingers. But now, I appreciate how much work my grandmother put into all those big holiday dinners so much more. I have a much better understanding of how much time and love went into making a big meal, including the five different pies waiting in her sewing room for all of us to enjoy! 

While Christmas gifts were always exciting, (and always hidden behind my grandfather's favorite chair where us kids were forbidden from peeking at until present time … which was pure torture!), I can't recall any of the toys I received. The only gifts I actually remember specifically were the homemade slippers my grandma crocheted for each of us grandchildren and the footy pajamas she always gave us. I remember how we would change into them before we left her house on Christmas Eve and my dad would carry me and my sister to the car, because our dress shoes wouldn't fit over the pj feet, and we would look at all the Christmas lights on the way home.  

I'm trying to keep in mind the memories that I've held onto as I create Christmas for my family this year. The impulse buys that overextend my budget and take away my peace aren't going to be what they remember. Stuff that overwhelms spaces isn't going to bring true joy. This is really hard for me because I really love to shop and I really love to give gifts! But this year, I am 100% dedicated to creating Christmas within our set budget. (Ok ... if I'm honest, I'm only 75% committed, but I'm relying on God's grace to get me the rest of the way there!) 

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I want my heart posture to mimic that of Mary as she travelled to Bethlehem carrying Jesus within her. Mary didn’t have everything figured out, but she trusted. I can imagine the peace and the comfortable silence that filled large parts of a journey that must have been exhausting and uncomfortable for Mary. But God provided, God was enough, and that first Christmas brought the greatest moment of joy for Mary to savor.  

No batteries required.  

 

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Copyright 2025 Michelle Hamel
Images: Canva