--- title: Our Own Via Dolorosa description: Samantha Stephenson reflects on how Mary’s posture of surrender can help us do the hard work of letting go of our children.   image: https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/20250407%20SStephenson%201.png --- [![catholic-mom-logo-v2](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/images/catholic-mom-logo-v2.svg "catholic-mom-logo-v2")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) [![search-icon](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/search-icon.svg)](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/our-own-via-dolorosa#) [PARENTING](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/tag/parenting) # Our Own Via Dolorosa Apr 7, 2025 8:30:00 AM  |  by [Samantha Stephenson](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/samantha-stephenson) ![featured image](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/20250407%20SStephenson%201.png) *Samantha Stephenson reflects on how Mary’s posture of surrender can help us do the hard work** of letting go of our children.*   --- ## Do I Love You Enough to Let You Suffer?   This road you walk is a painful one. Each of your wounds I feel in my own body. How, why, Lord, does it have to be this way?    I know that this is the way of life. Some gates only open by way of suffering. What waits on the other side: light, beauty, redemption. Your suffering is not without meaning and purpose. But what it costs me to watch you pass through it.    This is for good, I remind myself when I want to reach out and intervene. This trial, this setting of bone, this heartbreak, this long, slow march to Calvary. Am I strong enough to stay by your side, even through this?    I want to take your pain and make it my own. But what would that leave you?    ![null](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/20250407%20SStephenson%202.png?width=1080&height=1350&name=20250407%20SStephenson%202.png)    ## I Watch You Fight This Battle On Your Own  Sheltered from pain and struggle, a limp butterfly with wet, crumpled wings, grounded forever. It is the crucible of escaping the chrysalis on your own that frees you to take flight. So I watch you fight this battle on your own. Watch, and pray.    Mary and I stand shoulder to shoulder, watching our babies march through the wickedness of this world. We watch, we pray, we trust you to your Father. In this mystery that is motherhood, you were never truly ours. It is we who are yours. The suffering we’ve borne for you we would gladly embrace all again. And so, this too, we accept. The swords of your pain pierce our hearts, and with each beat we bleed. We accept this pain as you accept your cross. We hold it close, our last-resort love.   We’ve given you everything we have to give. This, you must do on your own. Take our love and our lessons. Suffer well.     ![null](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/20250407%20SStephenson%203.png?width=1080&height=1350&name=20250407%20SStephenson%203.png)    I will, like Mary, stand watch until it’s over, and hold you when it ends.    Share your thoughts with the Catholic Mom community! You'll find the comment box below the author's bio and list of recommended articles. --- Copyright 2025 Samantha Stephenson Images: Canva ### Share this article [![Share on Facebook](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/facebook-24x24.png)](http://www.facebook.com/share.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Four-own-via-dolorosa%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dfacebook) [![Share on Twitter](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/twitter-24x24.png)](https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?original_referer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Four-own-via-dolorosa%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Four-own-via-dolorosa%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&source=tweetbutton&text=Our%20Own%20Via%20Dolorosa) [![Share on Email](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/email-24x24.png)](mailto:?subject=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Four-own-via-dolorosa%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail%20&body=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Four-own-via-dolorosa%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail) ** #### About the Author ![Samantha Stephenson](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/Samantha%20Stephenson%202026.png) ### [Samantha Stephenson](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/samantha-stephenson) Samantha Stephenson is a Catholic author helping readers navigate the spiritual and ethical questions shaping our rapidly changing world. She hosts the podcast Brave New Us and writes the Choosing Human Substack newsletter. Samantha homeschools her four children and tends a sprawling garden in Idaho's Snake River Valley. Find her at [SNStephenson.com](http://SNStephenson.com). ## Related Blog Articles [ Bringing Each Other to Jesus Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/bringing-each-other-to-jesus) [ Monsters in the Dark: Facing our Sin and Shame with God's Light Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/monsters-in-the-dark-facing-our-sin-and-shame-with-gods-light) [ Marks of … Love? Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/marks-of-love) ## Comments ## Donate now [![Support Catholic Mom](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545) [![CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png?width=1806&height=731&name=CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png "CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) ##### Subscribe to Catholic Momcast on iTunes or Spotify [![itunes-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/itunes-logo-black.svg)](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/catholic-momcast/id1362352357)[![spotify-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/spotify-logo-black.svg)](https://open.spotify.com/show/15CoipHL7z61IDcYErV0b8?si=hqaQJSxDQgq7S1hxCwsoxQ) ##### CatholicMom on Social Networks [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) ##### About Catholic Mom [Who We Are](https://www.catholicmom.com/about-us) [Contact Us](https://www.catholicmom.com/contact) [Support CatholicMom.com](https://www.catholicmom.com/support-us)   ##### Associated Links [Holy Cross Family Ministries](https://www.hcfm.org/) [Family Rosary](https://www.familyrosary.org/) [Family Theater Productions](https://www.familytheater.org/) [Congregation of the Holy Cross](https://www.holycrossusa.org/) [Father Patrick Peyton, C.S.C.](https://www.fatherpeyton.org/) [The Peyton Institute for Domestic Church Life](https://www.peytonfamilyinstitute.org/) ### **Stay connected!** Don’t miss a thing! 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