Relying on Faith Helps Me Adjust to Life Changes

Betty Vertin recaps the many life changes she's experienced recently and considers how she has learned to lean on God in the midst of challenging times.

My name is Betty Vertin. I am a Catholic mom of seven who lives with my husband and children in south-central Nebraska. I thought I might need to reintroduce myself as it's been several months since I've written an article here. 

My apologies for the long absence. The events unfolding in my life in the past months have given me plenty to write about. 

My children range in age from two to 23. My youngest, Callie, is not quite old enough for preschool, but Lexi, my oldest, was just recently married. The five children filling in the age gap are living their best lives, and it feels like one of them is hitting a new milestone every time I blink. 

More changes than I expected

Lexi married on August 3 and moved to a new town to live with her husband. She now lives three and a half hours from me. Max, 19, is a freshman in college living with Duchenne muscular dystrophy. Despite insurmountable challenges, he moved into his dorm room precisely a week after his sister's wedding. And sometime in the middle of that, my third child, Chance, 17, took a college visit and committed to playing college baseball. 

At the beginning of the school year, not only was Chance starting his senior year, but Rowen, 15, and Charlie, 13, who also live with Duchenne muscular dystrophy, were beginning 10th and 8th grade, respectively. Mary, 10, was starting 4th grade, and Callie was home one more year before preschool started. 

That should have been enough.  

What a completely human thing to think! It has played out in my life as a human thought because God had more in store. 

In the last year, my family has experienced financial strain. I prayed relentlessly for an answer to that strain. All along, I was praying for relief for my family. But in all of my praying, I never once thought the answer would be that I would return to work. 

Eventually, however, after nearly 18 years at home, not sure if I was even employable, it became apparent that I might need to return to work.  I began cautiously applying for jobs, hoping that it would never come to fruition, that something else would present itself first. 

I was overlooked several times, and I wanted that to be a sign that I needed to stay home so that another answer would present itself. But then came a phone call that quickly changed the course of my life. 

An elementary school principal called me. She needed a teacher. She mentioned that two children in that classroom were non-verbal and that there were other children with similar needs. 

I told God, "I can't."

I thought to myself, I cannot give that much. I thought I was already a caregiver to three young men with Duchenne; I could not go to school every day and give more of myself. There would not be enough for the children in the class and my children at home. 

My relationship with God has always been blunt. Perhaps because I can be stubborn and independent, God has always laid out an answer for me — one that I can't ignore and make a mess of. 

After discussing the position with the principal and superintendent, I wanted to take a few days to think about it. Well, not even two days later, at Mass, the entire sermon was about giving. 

That day, Father reminded all of us (especially me) in Mass that God steps in when we are not enough, don't believe in ourselves, or are too tired to give anymore. God is always enough. 

I took the job a few days before my oldest daughter's wedding, agreeing to start work a few days after. 

God will do all the giving

It has been the craziest four months of perhaps my entire life. And I'm only a couple of months into this crazy new adventure, yet some part of me feels like I found the place I was always supposed to be. 

It is a path I never imagined taking, and I'm not sure how long I will be on it, but I trust that when I fail in all my humanness, God will do all the giving. 

It has sometimes seemed difficult, even impossible, for me to trust that God would step in and carry me. But my experience of the past months has softened me. I am at a place where I cannot do it alone. 

Yet, I am about to finish my first semester of work, my kids are all doing well, and my husband has been incredibly supportive. The only reason why is God. He is working through me to serve my family and the students I recently started to call my own. 

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Copyright 2024 Betty Vertin
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