Seeking God Among the Pots and Pans

Lea McCarthy reflects on how her prayer life has changed with motherhood, and how God invites us to meet Him within the responsibilities of daily life. 

Prayer Life Consternation?  

Saint Teresa of Avila wrote, “Even when you are in the kitchen, our Lord moves amidst the pots and pans” (The Book of the Foundations). Well, that’s good news for me, because as my tiny kitchen is also my laundry room and pantry, I feel like I only leave that section of the house to shower some days.  

Life is busy. I forgot how I organized last and need a map to find anything of my own. I can, however, find anything of my husband’s that he can’t, so I am on speed dial 24/7. The weeds grow more quickly when they sense fear. The baby requires constant entertainment, or she howls. It’s a constant challenge to find a few stray minutes during the day for prayer! When I try to read spiritual books during nap time, like Saint Thérèse of Lisieux I end up falling asleep myself!  

Our family usually makes daily Mass part of our morning routine, but don’t ask me what the readings were or what the homily was on. (“The Gospel? Well, that was when the baby got stuck under the kneeler and I had to rescue her.”)

I thought back to my younger days B.C. (before children). How lovely to spend a holy hour in front of the Blessed Sacrament as I journaled, meditated, and prayed with peace and silence reigning! But that was single me/newly married me who had that luxury. Now my Adoration time consists of me sitting on the steps of the chapel in front of the Blessed Sacrament as I help the toddler climb up and down the stairs, ad nauseam, feeding her Cheerios to keep her placid, and wandering around to touch all the statues and play with the rosaries.  

There isn’t a whole lot of mental prayer happening for me, as you can imagine! And yet, with my prayer life appearing poorer than ever, I always feel refreshed and peaceful afterwards. The only explanation is simply God bestowing grace in abundance to his distracted daughter, without any merit on my part. 

My Vocation Unites, Not Separates, From God  

There is a beautiful passage in the Letter to the Romans that exults:

What will separate us from the love of Christ? Will anguish, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or the sword? ... No, in all these things we conquer overwhelmingly through him who loved us. (Romans 8:35, 37).

This wasn’t just a message to the early Christians in Rome; it applies to my own life as well. What can separate me from the love of Christ? Tribulation, wailing and woe from the toddler who didn’t get the cookie she wanted? My own distress that I am not the perfect wife and mother but one who falls short in her vocation each day? Persecution from neighbors who complained to the city about our weeds growing over the sidewalk? (Actually, I hate to say it, but they had a point). The baby stripping naked and running around in front of dinner guests? Not having 60 minutes of uninterrupted prayer each morning before I start my tasks? 

No! None of these things separate me from Christ. Perhaps I can’t always do a holy hour like I used to. However, I don’t need to stress out about feeling like my vocation prevents me from praying, because that’s simply not true. Being a wife and mother is a gift from God and He always calls us to draw closer to Him within the responsibilities of our vocation. Christ reminded us of this when He said, “Whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me” (Matthew 25:40).  

When I do the chores, make dinner, or bathe the baby, I can unite myself to God and ask His blessing on those entrusted to me. It’s not as if life is siloed into “Prayer Time” and “Everything Else”; it can all be part of loving God and growing closer to Him. I just need to look at my life with “God-colored lenses” to find where He is hiding.  

So yes, my prayer life looks different than it did a few years ago. Its schedule is messy. It follows a less-predictable pattern and appears more creative than it used to be. But it is amazingly beautiful and fruitful nonetheless! God is teaching me to love Him in new ways in my vocation as a wife and mother. I am slowly learning to recognize His reflection as in the back of a spoon as He moves among the pots and pans. 

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Copyright 2025 Lea McCarthy
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