So Your New Baby Needs Godparents

Katie Fitzgerald offers some practical tips for moms who aren’t sure how to choose good godparents.  

Time and again, I see new moms posting online wondering how to find godparents for their new additions. If you need advice in this area, I have a few thoughts to offer.  

Godparent Requirements  

First, it’s important to know who is eligible to be a godparent. Each child only needs one godparent, and if there are two, one must be male and one female. Each godparent must be a Catholic in good standing. The person you choose can’t be someone who has left the Catholic faith or someone who is not Catholic.  

Many parishes will require potential godparents to request letters from their home parishes stating their eligibility to serve. (If you do not have two Catholic godparents, you may ask a non-Catholic from another Christian tradition to witness the Baptism. This person cannot be a fallen-away Catholic. He or she is called a Christian witness and must be joined by a Catholic godparent. A Christian witness alone is not sufficient.) 

You also want to choose godparents who will fulfill their role, not just of witnessing the baptism, but of praying for your child regularly. It’s a nice perk if the godparents will also be present in the child’s life on a regular basis, but it is far more important that the person you choose has a strong prayer life than whether he or she can come to your child’s birthday party every year, for example.

It’s also important to remember that there is no legal obligation attached to the role of godparent. Your children’s godparents are not the people who will raise them in the event of your death unless you designate them as such in your will.   

Considering Potential Godparents  

Once you are clear on the requirements, sometimes a potential godparent comes to mind right away. If you are fortunate to have a large practicing Catholic family or circle of friends, you might have many choices, and it might just be a matter of taking your pick.  

If you have a smaller circle of Catholics in your life, it does feel a bit trickier. Here’s where it becomes especially important to remember the primary role of a godparent. You might not know too many Catholics personally, but you go to Mass with a whole bunch of them every week. Someone you see at Mass could very well be the ideal godparent for your child. It might feel awkward to approach a virtual stranger, but we are all members of the body of Christ, and most people are honored to be asked.  

Three of my kids have family members as their godparents. The other two have couples who were only acquaintances of our family at the time those children were born. They have since become family friends because of their relationships with our kids as godparents. Perhaps asking that nice lady you see at Mass every week to serve as a godparent will spark a future friendship. You never know! If all else fails, contact your parish priest. He may have some suggestions for you as well.   

Asking Someone to Be a Godparent  

The last thing people sometimes worry about is how best to ask someone to be a godparent. I have asked by phone, by email, by letter, and in person, depending on the circumstances. In every situation, I have explained that I think the person would make an excellent godparent, and I have made sure to let him or her know that I don’t need an answer right away.  

Giving people a chance to think and pray over their response is always a good approach so that no one is put on the spot. To make sure you give potential godparents enough time to discern their reply, plan to ask the people you have selected with plenty of time to spare. The baby does not have to be born yet for you to make this decision, and you don’t want to be scrambling at the last minute when you’re sleep-deprived during those newborn days.  

Finding godparents sounds challenging, but in my experience, if you cast your net wide enough, the Lord will provide you with just the right people to support your child’s faith journey. I pray that your brand-new Catholic will have prayerful, faithful, and holy godparents who fulfill their role to the fullest. Amen.  

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Copyright 2025 Katie Fitzgerald
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