Merridith Frediani reminisces about her on-again, off-again practice of praying the Rosary — and how it finally became a permanent part of her prayer life.
The first time the Rosary crashed into my life, I was helping with an event at my parish. One night I felt God telling me to pray a Rosary every day until the event. I’d never prayed a daily Rosary, so it seemed like a big ask. I did a quick count of the number of days remaining: a Biblical 40 days. My response was not the immediate fiat of Mary. Are you sure? I asked God. I attributed this to an overactive imagination.
The next day the request returned. I decided to go for it. I launched in and quickly learned that a daily Rosary is work. I wasn’t great at managing the prayers and meditations, and I hadn’t memorized which Mysteries went with which days. There were even a few Mysteries I needed to look up because I wasn’t sure what they were. I got through it, and we had a successful event.
Then I stopped. There was a nagging feeling I should keep going, but I pushed it to the back of my heart. Too much work. Too busy.
Three years later, the Rosary returned. I was in a period of uncertainty and question marks, not sure what my future held and confused about my next step. A friend showed me a video on observing the Marian month of October by praying a full Rosary (all four mysteries) daily. It takes fortitude. I was intrigued. I’d recently had a prayer answered thanks to Mary’s intercession and I was high on the joy from that.
I accepted the challenge. I could do this. My days were long.
Four Rosaries a day is a lot. I quickly learned that I am not able to sit quietly meditating for as long as it takes, even if I spread them out. I took to pacing around the living room while I prayed to help me keep my focus. During that month, I received two big writing opportunities from out of nowhere. It couldn’t be a coincidence; I am told that St. John Paul II once said, “In the design of Providence, there are no coincidences.” I was flabbergasted and ecstatic. I continued with the four daily Rosaries in thanksgiving for these blessings.
Then I stopped. I went through phases of praying a Rosary most days alternated with times when I wouldn’t. Over time, I said fewer and fewer.
Recently the Rosary reappeared. While planning a vacation with extended family, I had qualms. I love my family, but like all families we have some disparate personalities. I decided to pray a 54-day novena. I didn’t know it included a daily Rosary. I can do this, I thought. I have done Rosary marathons before. This time I had a regular prayer practice, so inserting a Rosary wasn’t hard. I quickly learned that I needed the Holy Spirit’s help before I launched in every morning to avoid falling asleep. The Holy Spirit is a reliable helper, and I soldiered on. On the final day I set down the Rosary beads and felt good. Graces abounded on that vacation, including near perfect weather. It was a gift.
Then, again, I stopped. I arrived home with a head cold and a sense of sadness. I missed spending good time with my people and re-entering the life I love was hard. Before long, I was a raw bundle of emotion and aggravation. My husband wisely asked if I was still praying the daily Rosary.
I admitted I’d stopped after the novena. Clearly, that was a mistake. That night I started again, and within two days I was back to my regular joyful self. I loved my life again.
I’m keeping it up now. There is something mysterious about the Rosary. When I pray it I feel good — better than good. I feel close to Jesus and my family and friends. I feel spiritually energized. But I wonder: am I praying it because of how good I feel or am I praying it out of love of God?
If I stopped feeling good, would I keep it up? I think yes. One of the many things I adore about our Catholic faith is the myriad of “tools” available to assist us in our journey closer to Jesus and heaven. The Rosary is one such tool and as I reflect on its presence in my life, I notice that over time Jesus has been inviting me to encounter Him this way.
There are other devotions that are just as beautiful that I don’t feel drawn to. I realize as I write this that the Rosary has been stalking me all my life, beginning in first grade when I received my first one. Now I have rosaries stashed around the house, in each car, and on my office desk.
Perhaps it’s not a transactional thing at all but instead, Jesus drawing me closer to Him and I’m experiencing the fruits of my yes to Him. May is another Marian month; perhaps Jesus is asking you to meet Him in the Rosary too. I promise you He is a patient teacher and if you stumble, as I did, He will still be there waiting. He is so good.
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Copyright 2024 Merridith Frediani
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About the Author
Merridith Frediani
Merridith Frediani loves words and is delighted by good sentences. She also loves Lake Michigan, dahlias, the first sip of hot coffee in the morning, millennials, and playing Sheepshead with her husband and three kids. Merridith writes for Catholic Mom, Diocesan.com, and her local Catholic Herald. Her first book, Draw Close to Jesus: A Woman’s Guide to Adoration, is available at Our Sunday Visitor and Amazon. You can read more at MerridithFrediani.com.
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