The Secret Sauce of Faith Formation: How to Keep Kids Catholic

Janelle Peregoy emphasizes parents' vocational call to bear witness to the love of Jesus and introduce our children to the community of faith. 

I recently had the privilege of discussing the domestic church to a classroom full of Catholic school educators. We were brainstorming ways to encourage Catholic families to truly center their home life on Christ. If you want to learn more about the pillars of the domestic church, I have previously written about it through the lens of gift-giving in Pope Francis’ Unofficial Catholic Gift Guide. 

Any time I discuss the domestic church, I reference a longitudinal study released by the McGrath Institute at the University of Notre Dame: A Report on American Catholic Religious Parenting. This study interviewed “cradle Catholics" who maintained their faith into their 20s and 30s. The interviewers concluded that three consistent factors have a profound impact on faith formation for these young adults. 

Model the Catholic Faith 

As the Church acknowledges, parents are the first educators of faith. Ergo, this may be the most obvious influence in maintaining Catholic identity in young adults. In a world where parents often compete for the attention of their children against a myriad of distractions, we must never forget the power of our influence. As parents, we have a vocational call to bear witness to the love of Jesus and introduce our children to the community of faith. 

A huge component of this is modeling our own faith. Are we engaged in the life of our parish or other Catholic organizations? Do we regularly pray together as a family? Do we invite our children into conversations about faith and how it affects our daily actions and concerns? Do we create opportunities for children to have novel religious experiences? 

The reality is that authentic spiritual engagement requires more than simply attending Mass on Sundays. 

Cultivate the Community of Faith 

Parents and children need a broader church community to reinforce the lessons from home. Children and youth thrive in religious environments where other trusted adults are also modeling the gift of faith. For some young people, that may look like developing a relationship with “that cool youth minister” who unabashedly discusses his or her relationship with Jesus. It may mean families inviting their pastor over for dinner in their home. It may also be as easy as getting other families from your parish over together for a board game night. We are called to prioritize community. 

Church does not simply “happen on Sundays” but any time we gather in Christ’s name. 

Adopt a Catholic Culture 

It is not enough to share religious traditions and rituals with children. Eventually, they need to understand the why behind them. For example, it may be a poignant practice to construct a family altar in celebration of All Souls Day but if families are not actively praying for their departed family members, it becomes an empty gesture. How does what we do as Catholics connect us to God’s love?  

Catholic culture is a broad definition and is going to be shaped by cultural and regional practices of Catholicism. The takeaway here is that the whole family must enter into a deeper understanding of what those traditions symbolize. 

Creating the Context  

It may be demoralizing for parents and grandparents to hear how frequently younger generations are disengaging from the Church. The good news here is that parental influence is still paramount. 

We can create the context where family life is centered around Christ. If we do this successfully, our spiritual and religious practices will flow authentically from our family’s commitment. 

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Copyright 2025 Janelle Peregoy
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