To My Neurodiverse Middle-Schooler

Caroline Godin writes an open letter to her middle-school son to help him navigate his own mental health and the world around him.

You are Enough

My dearest boy, oh, how I love you! You will never fully know how much, but what you know is enough. You are enough. Always remember that: You are enough. 

I know your thoughts race. I know you worry about things that aren’t there, even though you know they aren’t there. I know how much it bothers you that you can’t step out of your fears easily. I know you feel less because of it. My love, you are not less. You are never less. You are more than you know. 

I see you scratching your scabs, trying to hide your nervous habits. I know you’re anxious. I see your face fall in the middle of a happy moment because you question something. You wonder if you belong—you absolutely do. 

I hear you mumbling under your breath when you’re aggravated. I hear the tone in your voice when you’re frustrated. I hear your voice quiver when you’re trying to be strong. You think you can’t show weakness. You think you’re weak. You are stronger than you know.

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I dedicated you, a prophet to the nations I appointed you.” (Jeremiah 1:5)

Ups and Downs

The summer should have been a good break. You should have gone outside more. But we struggled, didn’t we? Emotions went up and down. The tablet went on and off, mostly on. You stewed, you receded, you retreated into your head where the self-talk is dark. I was at a loss, my love. I missed your smile. 

Remember that teacher you dreaded? You had him this year and ended up liking him. Remember agonizing over returning to school? You had a great first day. A week later you fell again, but a day later you were happy. You claimed to have no friends, then you wanted to invite your entire team over. The rollercoaster never seems to end. 

Remember through all the valleys, you have ups to look back on and forward to. Also, I am with you through it all. If we need to sit in a valley together, so be it. When you’re ready, I’ll help you climb out again. 

Life is not without challenges; love is not without a cross to bear. You will have trouble on the road. I have always told you the truth. The world will not do that. The world will lie and tell you you need to be happy and do whatever it takes. I tell you there is something more important than the short joys of this life.

“I have told you this so that you might have peace in me. In the world you will have trouble, but take courage, I have conquered the world.” (John 16:33)

True Joy

God, our loving Father and Creator, is the most important. His love for you far surpasses my own. I can’t imagine it, but it does. He wants you to be filled with joy, but joy in Christ is not the same as the fleeting happiness of the world. No amount of video games, sports cards, or wins can overtake that. 

Joy in Christ is confidence in Him, that He’s working all things for your good (Romans 8:28). It means that even through the valleys, no matter how jagged the path, you are content because you know you have a Companion to bring you through it. He walks with you, guarding you from enemies and dangers (Psalm 23). He will light your path (Psalm 119:105). This is true courage. 

Someday, school and sports will be over and new challenges will begin. Equip yourself now with the armor of God (Ephesians 6:11-17). Find faith and confidence in Jesus Christ. When your head swirls with confusion, find a quiet space to be with Him. When you’re worried, remember His promise. Confide in Him your fears, hopes, concerns, and dreams. He will silence the dark thoughts. Then, when you’ve poured out your heart, my love, be still. He is best heard in the silence of your heart. He is speaking to you through His Spirit.

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Life is not without challenges; love is not without a cross to bear. #catholicmom

My love, no one on this earth will love you like I love you, but One beyond this world loves you greater. When I am not, He is here with you, always.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you may abound in hope by the power of the holy Spirit. (Romans 15:13)

Copyright 2022 Caroline Godin
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