To the Mom Sending Her First Child to College

Barb Szyszkiewicz shares a message of encouragement to moms preparing to let go of their college-bound teens.

I saw you last Saturday in the supermarket.

At this time of year, in the place where I live, there are two reasons a whole family might be in the supermarket at the same time on a Saturday morning: they’re on their way to their shore house for the week, or they’re sending a kid off to college.

Lessons in the Laundry Aisle

Since I ran into you in the laundry aisle, where you were carefully explaining the purposes of each product you placed in the shopping cart to your teenage son, it’s a good bet you’re about to be the mom of a college student.

Your husband waited patiently during your laundry tutorial, and your son seemed confused by the whole thing. (I’m not going to judge you for not making him wash his own clothes before now. I’m all about not doing laundry until there’s a full load, so in my house, it’s always been family laundry, not individual laundry.)

And you looked equal parts excited for him and bravely trying to hold it all together.

At the checkout, your family lined up behind me, with your cart full of paper towels and laundry stuff. You asked your son if he would need any mayo.

I Didn't Want to Intrude

He was done with the whole thing, clearly, and barely mumbled an answer. That’s the reason I didn’t greet you and ask you what college he’d be going to, and wish all of you the best — I didn’t want you to get back to the car and get a lecture from your kid about talking to nosy strangers in the store. And I didn’t want to intrude on your family moment.

As a mom who’s done the freshman move-in three times before, I really wanted to let you know that he’d be OK. He’ll probably mess up a few things in the laundry, and he probably won’t make his bed all semester. Those paper towels are more likely destined to be plates for pizza than used to clean something.

I wanted to let you know that if you cared enough to take him through the store and show him how to use fabric softener, you’ve probably done a good job all along. I wanted to tell you that it’s hard to let the first one go, but it’s also exciting to see what he accomplishes. I might even have bragged a little about my own kids, all now out of college, all with good jobs in their chosen field of study, all living on their own, 2 out of 3 homeowners (so far).

But mostly I wanted to let you know that he’d be OK, and so will you. It’s going to be weird for a while, and you will dearly miss him, but it’ll be OK.

Thinking about it now, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you this when I saw you Saturday.

Share your thoughts with the Catholic Mom community! You'll find the comment box below the author's bio and list of recommended articles.

Copyright 2026 Barb Szyszkiewicz
Images: Canva