You Lead, I'll Follow

Elizabeth Reardon shares tips for success in spiritual direction.

“Spiritual direction, it seems to me, is a beautiful dance.”

An intimate sharing of self, a gracious reception of the Other. Each step towards self-knowledge is but a lyrical movement towards understanding of the pre-existing dispositions and disequilibrium within our lives. Oh, the freedom of movement that comes with awareness and surrender! No longer are we resolutely restrained by the confines of our former self, but in desiring to model the steps of our divine Partner we can finally abandon our will for His.

This is what St. Ignatius would refer to as resignation or indifference, a course of abandonment from self-seeking fulfillment to a desire to know and follow the will of God for our lives. This conversion of self and discernment of our next steps is, of course, the fruit of spiritual direction. Yet, as mankind is by nature relational, this dance reaches its fullest potential in dialogue with and under the guidance of a trained spiritual director.

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Helpful Rules of the Road of Spiritual Direction:

Friedrich Wolf explains:

“Spiritual direction cannot be confined to the religious realm … but must deal with the whole man and his actual problems” (Encyclopedia of Theology, ed. Karl Rahner)

Because of this, the more authentic and truthful you with are with the challenges you face in spiritual direction, the more helpful the time spent will be.

You must be open to hearing and considering what your discussion your spiritual director and God might be revealing about you and your situation without automatically defending a position. In entering spiritual direction, you are eliciting a perspective, not asking simply for an echo of your own. You may not have noticed something simply because you are too close, or too familiar with its occurrence.

If you become aware of a particular sin that could be holding you back or impeding your prayer life, consider the sacrament of reconciliation before your next session. Otherwise, this sin can also serve as an obstacle in being open and ready to be moved through direction.

Spiritual direction does compel a response or corresponding action by you. Simply speaking, once we see ourselves truthfully, in the light of faith, we begin to desire change. When we seek to follow Christ, we also wish to model our lives after Him.

Let go of all which prevents you from growing spiritually closer to God. Very few choices in our life are without consequences, be they good or bad. So, it goes without saying that which doesn’t bring us closer to who God has intended us to be, is at best keeping us spiritually delayed.

Recognizing where you are today in your relationship with God allows you to envision who God wants you to be and to invite God into the decision-making process. This is the ideal environment for spiritual growth! Our relationship with God grows as we partner together in all of the decisions—big and small—that come before us. We may just find that we are less stressed about the outcome because we trust that we ask God to guide us in the first place!

Click to tweet:
Our relationship with God grows as we partner together in all of the decisions—big and small—that come before us. #CatholicMom

Have you thought about seeking greater direction in your life? If so, research local spiritual directors in your area to find one that might be accepting new directees.

If you already have a spiritual director, does he/she challenge you to see things from a new perspective? Are you resisting or accepting of the task ahead? Do you desire to dream God’s dream for you?

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