Worried about Worrying

"Worrywart" is a strange word. I looked it up in an online dictionary and it means a person who worries "unduly." That sounds like me.

I have been a worrywart all my life. I don’t like worrying, but I sure do a lot of it, especially lately. Ever since my husband's two hospitalizations this past summer, I have been such a wreck. I worry about him constantly and I know I must drive him crazy.

We recently went on a deacon's retreat and this worrying business was very much on my mind. When we were offered the opportunity to go to confession, I decided to go.

I told Father about my worrying and how I knew it was bothering my husband. It was even keeping me up at night. I told him I knew I needed to let go and trust in God, but how was I to do that?

He then gave me the scripture verse that I am very familiar with, but for some reason had not even thought about reading and praying with it -

"Can any of you by worrying add a moment to your lifespan?" - Luke 12:25

No, I cannot add a moment to my lifespan. Or my husband's. I knew that. However, I felt so much better after going to confession. Celebrating that sacrament. That encounter with Christ.

Oh, I am still a worrywart, but I am getting better at letting it go. I am trying to enjoy the present moment more. Because the present moment is where we are, my husband and I.

And that is also where God is.

"Do not be afraid any longer, little flock, for your Father is pleased to give you the kingdom." - Luke 12:32