--- title: A Time to Work and a Time to Play description: How to keep from killing your spouse in the empty nest years. --- [![catholic-mom-logo-v2](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/images/catholic-mom-logo-v2.svg "catholic-mom-logo-v2")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) [![search-icon](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/search-icon.svg)](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2014/02/19/a-time-to-work-and-a-time-to-play#) # A Time to Work and a Time to Play Feb 19, 2014 7:30:14 PM  |  by [Maria Morera Johnson](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/maria-morera-johnson) The weather has been a little crazy around here. This is the second full week off I’ve had since I went back to work on January 8th. I have no complaints. Mostly. We have all this time *together*. It’s a blessing, actually, to decide what Mass to attend, usually very early, because it’s what *we* want. Or how delightful it is to put the ground beef back in the fridge because dinner out sounds so appealing, and all it takes is the asking. No coordinating. No checking of schedules. No wondering what time we need to get back. But this mid-life, empty-nest, season of our lives -- call it what you want, is a little more complicated than figuring how *not* to step on each other’s toes for that first dance as man and wife at our wedding. You see, we’re always *together*. Suddenly, the Bickersons start to make sense. The hardest part of this new normal is trying to figure out how to work in the same space when we’re actually *occupying* the same space. That’s a little tricky. You see, we have different work styles, and frankly, we do very different kinds of work. He has a lot of phone calls and a lot of consulting. I need a lot of quiet and few interruptions. We’re both kind of social. That adds up to being in each other’s way a lot. That’s not conducive to workflow. It’s even less conducive to marital bliss. Where our communication before was usually sharing our schedules to make sure all the right bases were covered, activities were attended, and groceries were bought and cooked and put on the table, our new communication style revolves around different needs. We *need* to get our work done. We *desire* to hang around each other -- gee whiz, we got married because we liked to spend time together (ok, and a lot of other reasons). So what is the solution? Well, communicating. Talking. Having some hard but necessary conversations about what we need, and then trying to find the solution together. It’s actually pretty hard to do, especially when passive-aggressive huffing and puffing is easier. We have found that simply stating “I need two hours of absolutely no interruptions” works best. It’s clear, and the parameters are defined. And probably, at the two hour and one minute mark someone suggests we go out for ice cream. What’s not to love? ***How are you managing the new normal in the empty nest?*** *Copyright 2014 Maria Morera Johnson* ### Share this article [![Share on Facebook](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/facebook-24x24.png)](http://www.facebook.com/share.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F02%2F19%2Fa-time-to-work-and-a-time-to-play%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dfacebook) [![Share on Twitter](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/twitter-24x24.png)](https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?original_referer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F02%2F19%2Fa-time-to-work-and-a-time-to-play%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F02%2F19%2Fa-time-to-work-and-a-time-to-play%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&source=tweetbutton&text=A%20Time%20to%20Work%20and%20a%20Time%20to%20Play) [![Share on Email](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/email-24x24.png)](mailto:?subject=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F02%2F19%2Fa-time-to-work-and-a-time-to-play%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail%20&body=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F02%2F19%2Fa-time-to-work-and-a-time-to-play%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail) ** #### About the Author ![Maria Morera Johnson](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/Maria%20Johnson%202022.jpg) ### [Maria Morera Johnson](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/maria-morera-johnson) Maria Morera Johnson, author of *My Badass Book of Saints*, *Super Girls and Halo*, and *Our Lady of Charity: How a Cuban Devotion to Mary Helped Me Grow in Faith and Love* writes about all the things that she loves. A cradle Catholic, she struggles with living in the world but not being of it, and blogs about those successes and failures, too. ## Related Blog Articles [ Time for Goodbyes…and a Little Prayer Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2012/09/15/time-for-oodbyesand-a-little-prayer) [ What are you doing to keep yourself tethered to reality this Advent? Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2012/12/07/what-are-you-doing-to-keep-yourself-tethered-to-reality-this-advent) [ Movie Review: Tinā (Mother) Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/movie-review-tinā-mother) ## Comments ## Donate now [![Support Catholic Mom](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545) [![CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png?width=1806&height=731&name=CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png "CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) ##### Subscribe to Catholic Momcast on iTunes or Spotify [![itunes-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/itunes-logo-black.svg)](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/catholic-momcast/id1362352357)[![spotify-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/spotify-logo-black.svg)](https://open.spotify.com/show/15CoipHL7z61IDcYErV0b8?si=hqaQJSxDQgq7S1hxCwsoxQ) ##### CatholicMom on Social Networks [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) ##### About Catholic Mom [Who We Are](https://www.catholicmom.com/about-us) [Contact Us](https://www.catholicmom.com/contact) [Support CatholicMom.com](https://www.catholicmom.com/support-us)   ##### Associated Links [Holy Cross Family Ministries](https://www.hcfm.org/) [Family Rosary](https://www.familyrosary.org/) [Family Theater Productions](https://www.familytheater.org/) [Congregation of the Holy Cross](https://www.holycrossusa.org/) [Father Patrick Peyton, C.S.C.](https://www.fatherpeyton.org/) [The Peyton Institute for Domestic Church Life](https://www.peytonfamilyinstitute.org/) ### **Stay connected!** Don’t miss a thing! 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