Am I a Loving Mother?

Sarah Appleton reflects on what it means to be a loving mother, guided by 1 Corinthians 13. 

Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, [love] is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7) 

Am I a Loving Mother? 

When I was first posed with the question, “Am I a loving mother?” I was baffled. Of course! I thought. I am a loving mother: I tend to my child’s needs, make sure he’s fed, clean his clothes, and smother him in kisses all day. Doesn’t that make me a loving mother? Sure, but am I a biblically loving mother?  

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is a timeless passage that encourages us to reflect on how we love others and what love truly is. It can help all mothers reflect on how they biblically love their children each day. When I read through this passage slowly, I realize that biblical love goes deeper than the everyday tasks that I do for my child. Of course, making meals, changing diapers, and keeping a tidy home are important expressions of love, but 1 Corinthians 13 reminds me that love is more than action; it’s the spirit in which I carry out those actions.  

Love Is More Than Action 

Love is patient, love is kind.

How often am I patient with my child? Do I pause and take a deep breath when he spills his water again or runs to throw something in the toilet for the tenth time that morning? Patience means choosing to respond gently, even when my natural impulse is frustration. Kindness is not only soft words but also a tender presence that assures my child he is safe, valued, and cherished. Am I quick to anger, or do I take the time to teach and encourage my child?  

It is not jealous, it is not pompous, it is not inflated.  

This verse made me pause. As mothers, jealousy doesn’t always show up in obvious ways. Sometimes it’s comparing my child to another or myself to another mother. Sometimes it’s wishing I had more time, more help, more recognition. Love frees me from that trap. Love doesn’t boast in my sacrifices or inflate my importance. A loving mother serves faithfully, knowing that God sees what is hidden and rewards what is faithful.   

It is not rude, it does not seek its own interests. 

This one stings. How often do I seek my own comfort over what is best for my child? Love calls me out of selfishness and into service. This means that I learn to balance self-care with self-gift. Biblical love respects my child as a person, not as an inconvenience. My giving shapes his soul and mine.   

It is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury. 

I think of times I’ve snapped in irritation, only to regret my harsh tone moments later. Love is slow to anger. It doesn’t keep score of how many nights that I’ve lost sleep or how many tantrums I’ve endured. Love lets go of resentment and allows me to see my child through the lens of grace and as a gift.   

It does not rejoice of over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth.

As a mother, I want to guide my child into what is good and true. That means I can’t ignore disobedience or excuse bad behavior, but neither can I shame or belittle. Love corrects with gentleness and guides a child toward virtue. I am called to nurture his body and also to shepherd his heart toward the truth of Christ.   

It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 

This final line is perhaps the most fitting description of a mother’s love. We bear sleepless nights, endless messes, and countless worries about our children. We believe in them, we hope for their happiness, and above all, their salvation. We endure because motherhood is a lifelong vocation of self-giving, and love never fails.  

The Beauty of Biblical Love 

When I measure myself against this passage, I see clearly that I fall short. I am not always patient. I do get easily frustrated. I sometimes seek my own comfort above my child’s needs. But here is the beauty of biblical love: it is not something I can ever muster up on my own. It is the love and grace of Christ that transforms my ordinary mothering into something extraordinary, a love that only reliance on Christ can teach.  

So, am I a loving mother? By the world’s standards, maybe. But by God’s standard, I am learning to be one. Love is a daily choice, a daily practice, and a daily grace. Through motherhood, God teaches me how to love like Him, revealing how He loves us- patiently, kindly, humbly, and enduringly. When I return to 1 Corinthians 13, I am reminded that I am called to be a loving mother, not a perfect one. With God’s help, that is possible.   

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Copyright 2025 Sarah Appleton
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