Carry the Lessons of Lent into Ordinary Time

Megan Cottam evaluates the tools needed to create lasting spiritual growth in our lives. 

Back in the beginning of February, we found ourselves brainstorming Lenten practices for the upcoming 40-day experience. If you were like me, you found yourself browsing various online curated lists, waiting for inspiration to strike. As we now find ourselves in the middle of this journey, some of us realize that we may have aimed too low, too extreme, or even too obscure. 

I questioned family and friends about their most impactful Lenten disciplines, with the goal of discovering how we can take this practice and apply it to our faith journeys in general. How do we create lasting spiritual transformation in our lives? How do we discern where the Lord seeks change? 

 Three trends emerged that are good challenges to take to heart throughout the entire year: 

Discern your weaknesses openly with your family.  

As much as we would all love to improve upon our flaws without anyone taking notice, experience points to the fruitlessness of hiding ourselves from others and God. We need one another—to change perspectives, to provide strength and encouragement, and to see more clearly the will of God in our lives. Our social nature requires that we open ourselves up to experience community feedback. Those individuals who had memorable Lenten disciplines began with a conversation with family, spouses, their pastor, or friends, and asked for their input on what may need to change in their lives.  

In doing this courageous work, we also model for our children the importance of openness to change and the normalcy of imperfection. In order to grow towards sainthood and deeper into relationship with our Lord, our lives require reflection, vulnerability, and feedback. 

Have an accountability plan.  

Not only is it helpful to seek community wisdom to discern changes in our life, but community is essential for encouragement, accountability, and staying power throughout any path to transformation. Those who reported true and lasting growth during Lent all had concrete ways to measure their progress. If there was a setback in progress, there was a remedy to repair that setback. If general rules, such as “be more present” or “spend less time on my phone” were established, these each had built-in accountability, such as weekly check-ins for family members to judge your presence, or an app to track the concrete minutes browsing your phone. If someone cheated on a practice, there was an additional fasting or penance to reconcile that day. Did you vow to yell less, but lost your temper on a hard day with your child? The next day, you would serve your penance with 30 minutes of intentional one-on-one time with that child.  

The value of accountability is that it provides grace for adjustments. The successful spiritual changes made by individuals had plenty of setbacks but included room for correcting, adjusting, and changing how they achieved their ultimate goals. Do not let the rigidity of an original rule or purity of having a 100% success rate prevent you from the change that the Lord wishes to make in your heart. 

Be able to answer the question, “How does this bring me closer to God?” 

Some humorous stories certainly emerged of Lenten disciplines that were memorable for their strangeness, but not for their ultimate purpose. In my own life, my husband gave up coffee one year for lent. He was grumpy, unable to function, and just a plain mess for those 40 days! I assure you; he was not closer to the Lord from his fasting and may have caused my own setbacks in patience as well.

The Lord does not want us to fast for fasting's sake. It is not a competition for extremity. Rather, it is the creation of space to build relationship with Him. In order to answer this question of what will bring us closer to God, we must first acknowledge what separates and distracts us from Him. It is these things that must vanish from our life. Setting goals such as decluttering or losing weight can be nice, but unless they are connected to a spiritual purpose, they will not endure. We must be radically honest with ourselves as to the purpose of our disciplines: Is it for God, or just for ourselves?  

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How do we create lasting spiritual transformation in our lives? How do we discern where the Lord seeks change? #CatholicMom

A posture of spiritual growth in our life can extend beyond Lent, if we have the vulnerability, accountability, and discernment to seek our spiritual path with persistence, in community, and most importantly, with the grace to evaluate and adjust as we go. May God bless you on your journey and lead you ever closer towards His loving will for your life. 

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Copyright 2024 Megan Cottam
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