Friendship With Christ: Lessons from Three of Jesus’ Closest Companions

On the Feast of Saints Martha, Mary, and Lazarus, Sarah Damm shares four lessons we can learn about friendship with Christ. 

Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. (John 11:5) 

Today, we celebrate the Feast of Saints Martha, Mary, and Lazarus. Up until 2021, this day exclusively honored Saint Martha. 

Friendship with Christ Starts with Faith 

From the Gospels of Luke and John, we quickly learn that Martha, Mary, and Lazarus were three of Jesus’ dearest friends. They welcomed Jesus and His apostles into their home, and Martha is depicted as the one who offered the finest hospitality to Our Lord.  

Tradition tells us that Martha and her siblings were born of prominent parents, and after they died, she inherited their estate in Bethany. Martha was known for good works and charitable deeds. She is one of the first women to recognize Jesus as the true Messiah, which is recorded in the Gospel of John.  

“Yes, Lord. I have come to believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, the one who is coming into the world.” (John 11:27) 

Correction Leads to Conversion 

The most well-known Gospel account of Martha is when she complained to Jesus about her sister Mary not helping her. And Jesus admonishes her for worrying too much about earthly things.  

“Martha, Martha, you are anxious and worried about many things. There is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part and it will not be taken from her.” (Luke 10:41-42) 

As Catholic moms, we understand where Martha is coming from. We serve our families, like Martha, sometimes to the point of overwhelm. The critique in Jesus’ words stings a little, and we can grow defensive of Martha.  

But if we really listen to what Jesus is saying, we also hear the compassion Jesus has for Martha, even in His correction, as He lovingly calls her by name. (see Isaiah 43:1)  

Yes, it is important to note that Jesus does not reprimand Martha for her generosity and hospitality. In fact, I am sure He appreciated her comfortable home and delicious meals! Instead, Jesus addresses her anxiety and worry, and gently guides her back to a place of recollection, a place that Mary never leaves. For Jesus knows that Martha's work is good, but it could be more fruitful and joyful if done from a seat at His feet.  

In her book Jesus Approaches, Elizabeth M. Kelly writes,

I think [Jesus is] inviting her to this radical reordering, calling her back to a recollected state, to remind her who she really is and how even her hospitality must be rooted in and fed from that listening place.  

Thus, Martha takes Jesus’ words to heart. His loving but firm reprimand transforms Martha and strengthens her faith. Because the next time Martha appears in the Bible (John 11), she proclaims with unwavering confidence that Jesus is the Christ. 

What Happened Next, According to Tradition

After Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead, nothing more is said in the Gospels about these holy siblings. However, in Lives of the Saints, Fr. Francis X. Weninger notes that Martha and Mary were among “the other pious women, on Mount Calvary at the time of the Saviors’ Passion.”  

After Pentecost, the siblings were baptized and eventually made their way to modern-day France, “where St. Mary Magdalen retired to a life of penance, and St. Lazarus acted as Bishop of Marseilles.” (Fish Eaters) Martha converted many virgins, and then she settled in a secluded place to dwell with other women “who desired, like herself, to spend their days far from the tumult of the world, in chastity and peace, and to lead a cloistral life …” Eight days before she died, she saw the soul of her sister ascend to Heaven, accompanied by angels. Then, just before she died, it is said that Jesus appeared to her and said, “Come, beloved one; as thou hast received Me in thy terrestrial home, so will I receive thee now in My heavenly mansion.” (Lives of the Saints) 

Lessons on Friendship with Christ 

From the life of Saint Martha and her siblings, we learn four beautiful lessons about friendship with Christ:  

1. Jesus desires friendship with us. 
2. Jesus has compassion for us even when He corrects us. 
3. From Jesus’ correction, there is the hope of conversion. 
4. When Jesus sees our trust in Him — like He saw in Martha and Mary at the grave of Lazarus — He is deeply moved. “Jesus wept.” (John 11:35) 

Saint Martha is the patroness of homemakers, cooks, innkeepers, domestic servants, and those whose work centers around hospitality. Together, Saints Martha, Mary, and Lazarus are patron saints of siblings.  

Saints Martha, Mary, and Lazarus, pray for us! 

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Copyright 2024 Sarah Damm
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