Help After Miscarriage

Kathryn Swegart shares her story about the heartbreak of miscarriage, along with comforting resources for moms experiencing pregnancy loss.

Even after all these years I remember the moment well. It was Tuesday, May 17, 1988. I awoke to discover that I was having another miscarriage, my second in seven years. It was also the day my father died. For years I called those days “the week that was.” I ended up in the hospital and missed my father’s wake and burial. I had two small children who I shielded from my grief. It was a double grief. One had to go on the back burner. I chose the miscarriage. Over the years, I had three more miscarriages. I stuffed those also.  

For years I repressed my grief until I had an encounter with Jesus in a Eucharistic procession. As Jesus in the monstrance approached, I blurted out a question. “Why did you give me five children and then take them away?” The floodgates opened and I sought help. 

A wise priest gave sound advice: Give them names and invite your parish priest to lead a prayer service with your family. It felt like a dark cloud had been dispersed in my heart. I even saw the lost children as my little saints in heaven who could pray for us. 

I was not alone in my grief. The online journal MedicalNewsToday.com states that the overall risk of miscarriage is 15.3%. Estimates of miscarriages in the U.S. range from 400,000 to 900,000 each year. 

Yes, I was not alone in my grief. Saints and their families also experienced child loss. We can turn to them in prayer. 

Saints who Experienced Miscarriage or Infant Loss 

Saints Louis and Zélie Martin, parents of Saint Thérèse of Lisieux, lost four children through miscarriage or stillbirth in four years. Grief brought them closer to Christ, holy and purified through suffering. 

In 2012, Servant of God Chiara Corbella died at the age of 28. Her first child, Maria, died thirty minutes after birth. She wrote of the experience:

The day of Maria’s birth I shall recall as one of the most beautiful days of my life. I shall tell all of my children they have a special sister who is praying for them in heaven. (CatholicLink.com)

How blessed we are as Catholics. We can reach up to heaven and the communion of saints. Many resources are available to families grieving the loss of a little one. PrayMoreNovenas.com offers a list of novenas that can aid in the healing process.  

Many dioceses also have healing services for women who have experienced miscarriages or abortions. Check your local diocese for information. 

You may want to read a book published by Sophia Institute Press, Nursery of Heaven by Cassie Everts and Patrick O’Hearn. It tells the story of Cassie’s losses and offers aid on ways to help in the healing process. 

Healing Is Possible 

Now we have come full circle. In January 1989, I experienced my third miscarriage in a row. All was doom and gloom. We even adopted a collie puppy to fill the void. Soon after that, I was pregnant again. Miracles do happen. In December, I gave birth to a healthy baby boy.

Peter’s birth put me on the road to healing, culminating in my plea to Jesus when He came to me in the Eucharist. A child loss support group sent pink plastic flowers for each of the children. Attached to the stems was a card with this poem. 

A tiny flower,
lent, not given …
to bud on earth,
and blossom in heaven. 

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Copyright 2026 Kathryn Swegart
Images: Canva