How to Get Along with (Almost) Everybody

Lindsey Mitzel reviews Dr. Ray Guarendi’s latest book, which focuses on how we can relate to everyone (including ourselves) better.

How to Get Along with Almost Everybody

By Dr. Ray Guarendi

Published by EWTN

How to Get Along with Almost Everybody is Dr. Ray Guarendi’s newest book. Published by EWTN, it is a dive into all interpersonal relationships, including everyone from colleagues to kids to extended family. In this book, Dr. Ray focuses on several topics of communication and thought processes which affect relationships. I really appreciated how each section is applicable to a variety of relationships, including one’s spouse, children, extended family, and friendships or acquaintances/colleagues.  

I found the book to be accessible and very down-to-earth. Most chapters are also only a few pages, which is perfect for busy moms and families. Advice is to the point and geared toward introspection. This book challenges assumptions and preconceptions one can tend to make about others or situations. At the same time, Dr. Ray offers clear advice for each scenario: thoughts to consider, counsel for the hard moments. A lot of advice includes holding one’s tongue, patience, and long-suffering. In this way, his advice follows saintly advice, like Saint Therese’s Little Way.  

On assuming others’ motives, Dr. Ray advises:  

Don’t read motives. Even if you tried not to, you couldn’t succeed. Searching for what moves others is an ingrained social drive. The counsel is “Be cautious when you do read motives. Realize you could be wrong  —by a little or a lot.” Relationships can severely, sometimes irreparably, be marred by imputing motives that don’t exist (48).  

On being offended, he offers:  

Dislike is separate from offense. I dislike when my children make poor decisions. Their decisions, though, don’t affect me directly. To be offended, I must think, “They shouldn’t be doing this to me.” In fact, they are not doing anything to me. Likely, I’m not even on their minds when they act poorly ... Only one person never deserved offense ... Jesus endured more slander and scorn in three years than I will in a lifetime. Am I more worthy of respect than He? (56)  

Beautifully put, and especially helpful for parents, is what Dr. Ray writes about good apologies. He states: 

This side of Heaven, it’s impossible never to say or do anything hurtful, nasty, snotty, mean-spirited, (enter synonyms here). What’s more, much misconduct is not a “once and never again.” It repeats itself. What is said and done can’t be unsaid and undone, but a sincere expression of regret and sorrow can always be done. Actually, it can make things better. (130-131)  

I really appreciate Dr. Guarendi’s very practical book on tips and tricks to get along with almost everyone better. I really like that his focus is on ways we can change our own perspectives of others, and how we can grow in maturity. His book is focused on accepting a true humility for ourselves, with a beautiful approach to faith, and a little self-depreciating humor mixed in for good measure. I am convinced that every relationship, even the most challenging one in our life, will benefit from the advice Dr. Ray offers in this book.  

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Copyright 2025 Lindsey Mitzel
Images: Canva