Nikki Lamberg wonders why, since we are social beings, we feel we need to take on the world alone.
Just ask. Can it really be that simple? Asking a friend to go for a walk; asking your spouse to take on solo duty with the kids so you can take a moment to yourself; asking your mom to help with the overwhelming big projects; or asking God to help you find peace and understanding in what you are seeking. All things that happen in our everyday life, that if not put into perspective can start to feel like mountains you have to climb but only have enough oxygen to get over the first hill.
But what if, instead of using the word “ask,” we use the word “invite”? What if you invite your friend for a walk around the block, to just enjoy each other’s company or to use it as a mini therapy session. What if we invite our spouses to share in the household tasks when we could really use a little break? What if we invite our parents to make those big projects seem a little smaller? What if we invite God into our lives, to make the ins and outs a little easier to handle, and to bring us peace and understanding in our everyday moments?
I think sometimes it really is as simple as changing a word around to change our reality by focusing on the positive instead of the negative. As human beings, we were made to be social, not solo. As children of God, we are made to be His, not the world's. So why is it that we feel we need to take on the world alone? I think as moms especially, we feel we are the keeper of the social calendar and the after-school activities, the meal planner, the laundry do-er, and all things in between. And this is not to say that our spouses can’t, or don’t, help us. But I am willing to bet that we hold ourselves to a certain level of accountability and feel like we are failing when we do not meet that.
So how did we get to this place of feeling solo? And more importantly, how do we get out? God has given us so many verses in the Bible to tell us we are not alone, that we should lean on Him. That we aren’t meant to travel this world alone. The “Footprints in the Sand” story has been an all-time favorite of mine, and one that brings me peace knowing that on my hardest days, He will carry me to the next.
I also love Philippians 4:13: “I can do all things through who strengthens me.” This one was first introduced to me on a T-shirt I got in high school when I did a 3-on-3 basketball tournament at a Christian school. I wonder if they knew at the time how this Bible passage would carry me through for years to come. I really love that He does not say “with me you can do some things.” He says, “with me you can do ALL things”! What an amazing way to live life, knowing that if we keep Him at the center of all that we do, and if it is His will for us, then we can do it “all.”
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When life starts to seem overwhelming, I try to ask myself where God is in that situation. Am I trying to take it all on myself? Or am I letting Him in and giving Him all the control? #catholicmom
A few years ago, I attended a “Life in the Spirit” seminar, and in one of the volunteer talks a young women asked us a really great question and it’s one that I have thought about ever since. “Where is God in your life?” she asked us. “Is he in the trunk? You know He’s there if you ever need Him but you’ll keep Him there because you’ve got this? Is He in the backseat? Offering some advice, but like all great back-seat drivers, it’s often advice we ignore or disregard? Is He in the passenger seat? Offering directions but yet somehow you still take that wrong turn? Or is He in the driver’s seat? At the center of your life and guiding you towards His will for you and His will for the future of the world?"
Such a profound thought, that where we keep Him determines our attitude and the outcome of our everyday life. It really put into perspective how much I thought I was in control, in the driver’s seat, when really, I should be taking a few more driver’s education classes with Him instead. As a “type A,” releasing all control is not an easy thing, but when it comes to doing life on my own or life with God, there really is no choice.
When life starts to seem overwhelming, I try to ask myself where God is in that situation. Am I trying to take it all on myself? Or am I letting Him in and giving Him all the control?
What will you do? Will you ask Him for help? Will you invite Him into your life? To be present in your day in and day out? Will you let Him be the driver – letting you rest in peace and understanding in the passenger seat thinking, “Yes. God’s got this!”
Copyright 2021 Nikki Lamberg
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About the Author
Nikki Lamberg is a born and raised Catholic, full-time working, wife and mom of three young children. It brings her great joy to read, write and help others as she can, especially when it comes to infertility and raising young children.