Lady, Can You Spare a Smile?

Suzanne Beck describes the lasting impact of an unexpected question she heard when she encountered a man experiencing homelessness.

Several years ago, while in Santa Barbara for a business trip, I found myself walking down the main avenue late in the afternoon. Homeless men and women lined the streets, and, as most would be, I was a bit uncomfortable as they were all asking for a handout. Walking past one of the last men lying on the sidewalk, our eyes met. I immediately braced myself for the usual request, but was astounded to hear “Hey lady, can you spare a smile?”

Not a dime, not a dollar, not a cup of coffee—all he wanted was a smile, to be treated with dignity by a fellow human being. I gave him that gift and went on my way, grateful for the many blessings I have in life, but also very grateful to him for helping me see the blessing of a smile and other human beings—all of them.

In today’s world, with the crazy economic ups and downs ever present, it seems there are more and more people who are ending up in difficult situations, perhaps even full-blown homelessness. As a Christian, it’s sometimes very difficult to know how to respond to these requests. For centuries, Christians have been on the front lines helping the poor and marginalized. That’s what Jesus did after all, and not only are we called to imitate Him, but the Church also encourages us in corporal works of mercy: feeding the hungry, giving drink to the thirsty, clothing the naked, sheltering the homeless, visiting the prisoners and the sick, burying the dead, and giving alms to the poor.

null

So do we indeed sell all that we have and give it all to the poor? Do we invite strangers into our homes? Do we try to find them lodging? Do we buy them groceries? Give them cash? The needs are so varied, and many of the situations are complicated by mental illness, addiction, or family issues; yet many are just down on their luck.

Volunteers who work with the unhoused confirm that this can happen to anyone, regardless of education, background, or social status. The loss of a job, family collapse or illness could lead to anyone losing their home. In fact, if we are honest, most of us might be only a few paychecks away from this awful plight, which is a sobering thought. Governments, churches, and charities—all have various programs to help with the problems the homeless face and frequently argue about how to best handle and solve these issues, if indeed there is a solution.

But is preventing housing insecurity, and "saving" those affected by it, really the issue? Maybe for some, but for others maybe not. What if our job as Catholic moms in this season of our lives is simply to see Jesus in them? To see each one as a valued human being, one for whom Christ died? One for whom Christ lives? To help our children and grandchildren to see them that way?

What if we just looked them in the eye, asked their name, engaged them in conversation, asked their story, and offered to pray with and for them? What if we just SMILED at them?

null

Click to tweet:
What if our job as Catholic moms in this season of our lives is simply to see Jesus in those experiencing homelessness? #CatholicMom

There’s no quick or right answer to this question, and I’m not always perfect in my execution but my Santa Barbara experience opened my eyes to the humanity and dignity of every human being. In a meager attempt to put this into action in our community, my husband and I now keep a supply of:

small-denomination gift certificates to local businesses (fast food or sandwich shops where they could get a hot meal)
hats/scarves/mittens or handwarmers during the winter months
cold water/juice for summer months

When giving any of these to someone in need, we try to look the person in the eye and at least also give them a smile. Sometimes the situation will be right to ask their name or their story and offer to pray for them, perhaps even right there in the moment. Again, this small attempt won’t solve the crisis of homelessness, but it does help one person, and we’ve done our part in this season to see someone's dignity as a person for whom Christ died.