Mommy Milestones

Elizabeth Estrada considers how her role as a mom has changed with each milestone her son reached.

Did you know that these milestones are as important as a child’s milestones? 

My son is turning 19 very soon and this last year was filled with mixed emotions for me. His school journey looked different for him because of trauma and autism. It has been filled with many blessings and excitements but moments where being a mom felt very different. It wasn’t a good or bad feeling, just different. 

When my son started his job back in November of 2024, he had days with a lot of anxiety about not doing well, getting fired, and all the things. Nowadays, the anxiety is still present but it’s more about wanting to do a good job and being able to handle the non-stop breakfast rush. When he got hired, he tried the drive-thru, but it was too much. 

Now he has been working drive-thru and feeling that it is manageable and he can do it.  

When Our Kids Don't Need Us in the Same Way

I have been there to support him and help him regulate his emotions for the anxiety to be controllable. He is really the one putting in the effort and getting it done. So, I am not needed by him in the same way anymore. There were times that it seemed he couldn’t do anything without me or my support. 

It has been a blessing to see him being responsible, going to work, and even going when they call him on his off day. 

In all honesty, I didn’t think he would be able to function the way he is, based on his autism and what his doctors prepared me for. 

Reaching a New Parenting Milestone

As a mom I have called this parenting milestone the "cheerleader phase." Currently that seems to be all he needs from me. I am watching him, not too closely, but not too far away either. I cheer when he needs it and stand close enough to give him the support he needs. 

At home things are a bit different now, I am a single mom, so it’s just my son and me. Even though he is almost 19 years old, he still has responsibilities at home: cleaning up and being responsible for his space and being respectful of our shared spaces as well. 

These conversations have been both challenging, respectful, and loving. I have learned to trust in his judgement when he is on his own using public transportation because he doesn’t want to drive. 

He has a curfew, and he needs to answer his phone too.

Praying My Way Through It 

This time in my life has been challenging, but it has all been guided by the Holy Spirit and Mother Mary. I pray for guidance and for the ability to know their will instead of mine. Prayer has helped me navigate my role as a mom at every point in my child’s life. Sometimes all I can pray is, "Be here with me now." 

I have always prayed for my son and always will. God knows that even though my son is older and wiser I still need Him to guide, protect, and whisper in his ear when he’s out in the world. 

How are your milestones going? 

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Copyright 2025 Elizabeth Estrada
Images: Canva