My Second Letter to Young Mothers

With more time-tested advice to share, Bonnie Drury reaches out once more to young mothers.

Dear Young Mothers,

Let’s face it, you’re all younger than me. I wonder about giving advice because I’m a great-grandmother, and honestly, I don’t remember a lot about the day-to-day of raising my children. I do know that I care about what you’re going through in the throes of child-rearing in this turbulent world. But there are some things that are timeless that worked for me, and I hope might work for you, with your own creative twists.

Making Memories

I mostly recall that I didn’t know anything, but I kept trying to get it right. It was easier, I think, because our kids didn’t have cell phones or social media, with its daily bombardment toward faith and family. I did realize that my children needed to be assured that they were loved. One of the ways I tried to instill that knowledge was to put a batch of cookies or a loaf of bread in the oven, just before they got off the school bus. I hoped that the aroma of cookies baking would always remind them of their childhood, and home. There are all kinds of ways to make these memories.

I did help them with their homework, but as time went on, I didn’t always understand the new techniques of teaching and learning. But I could sit there, and we’d figure it out eventually. Dad had to step in when it came to math. At least we were in it together.

My Advice?

The bottom line is, take all the good advice and help you can get. When you feel lost and helpless, you are not alone. We’ve all been there. My most important suggestions would be:

Make sure your words are always loving and kind.

If you lose control, apologize and promise to do better. This will encourage them to do the same. All human beings are flawed, but we have the ability to pick ourselves up and try again.

Teach your children to do chores, to be responsible, to be helpful, to follow through.

They probably won’t like chores, but it will teach them responsibility, build their self-esteem, and help them to become independent when the time comes. Our boys now brag about the number of chores they were required to do growing up, even though they were unhappy about it at the time. They lost track of how many cords of firewood they split, carried, and stacked when that was our only heat. In the end, they felt good about their part in keeping the family warm. All five, as adults, are hard-working and self-sufficient.

I don’t know if any of this has helped, but I feel for you, as you struggle to solve the issues you face daily. You’re a saint, a hero, in your own way. There is no greater vocation on earth.

Recharge

Don’t beat yourself up, and know when you need rest. It’s okay to put yourself first when you need to recharge. My husband used to take over after dinner and homework so that I could soak in our claw-foot tub until the water ran cold.

God bless you, young (and older) moms. You’re the greatest asset we have, and your children will feel that as they grow into loving, kind, hard-working, respectful adults. Then you’ve accomplished your God-given mission.

With love,

Bonnie

(an old mom/grandmother/great-grandmother)

Disclaimer: This isn’t the place to discuss those wonderful moms who love children who are psychologically or physically challenged. That’s the time for professionals who are better able to help with their knowledge and advice. What I can do is keep you in my prayers.

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Copyright 2026 Bonnie Drury
Images: Canva