--- title: Raising Responsible Kids description: Mom and teacher Sheri Wohlfert offers seven tips for helping children learn responsibility, consistency, and follow-through. image: https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/20230118%20SWohlfert%201.png ---                                           [![catholic-mom-logo-v2](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/images/catholic-mom-logo-v2.svg "catholic-mom-logo-v2")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) [![search-icon](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/search-icon.svg)](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/raising-responsible-kids#) [PARENTING](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/tag/parenting) # Raising Responsible Kids Jan 18, 2023 11:30:00 AM  |  by [Sheri Wohlfert](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/sheri-wohlfert) ![featured image](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/20230118%20SWohlfert%201.png) *Mom and teacher Sheri Wohlfert offers seven tips for helping children learn responsibility, consistency, and follow-through.* --- Our children are created with a beautiful array of gifts, talents and personality traits. Unfortunately, being responsible isn’t something our kids are hard-wired for. Responsibility, consistency, and follow-through are learned behaviors. Here are some ideas to help.   #### The Truth Kids of all ages hate chores, and they will do just about anything to avoid them. This doesn’t make them difficult; it just makes them kids. It’s our job to set the expectation, demonstrate the behavior, and establish consequences that are more undesirable than the chores they are trying to avoid.   ![null](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/20230118%20SWohlfert%204.png?width=1080&height=1080&name=20230118%20SWohlfert%204.png)   #### The Plan Lay out clearly the responsibilities of each child. Explain what some of your responsibilities are and talk about what happens if there isn’t follow through. For example, your responsibility as a parent is to do laundry; their responsibility is to gather the clothes that need to be washed. Sharing responsibilities makes a family work so everyone in the family has a role.   #### Begin Early It is much easier to pick up a toddler's toys yourself, but sitting on the floor in a sea of toys holding the toy basket and coaching them will pay off in the long run. Kids want to be helpful at this age and something as simple as emptying the bathroom trash can is a way to begin learning responsibility. My most stubborn toddler was met with an empty snack bowl because he hadn’t put away his toys or emptied the trash can he was responsible for. I kissed his cheek and told him I would be responsible for putting blueberries in his bowl as soon as he took care of his responsibilities.   ![null](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/20230118%20SWohlfert%203.png?width=1080&height=1080&name=20230118%20SWohlfert%203.png)   #### When They Get It Right We notice and nag when kids neglect their responsibilities, but we need to notice when they get it right. They don’t need a trophy: a simple "thank you for being responsible and getting your laundry into the hamper" will do. I remember how my young daughter smiled during evening prayer when I said I was thankful for sparkly clean toilets. The task she dreaded became one she took great pride in.   #### Masterful Consequences Our kids and many of their friends raised 4-H animals and part of their responsibility was making sure they were fed, watered, exercised, and had a clean pen. Two of their friends had a tough time getting up early enough in the morning to get ready and take care of their pigs before school. They knew their mom would pick up the slack if they forgot and they were right the first couple of times—but the third time it happened, Mom arrived at school in her chore clothes, walked into the girls' classrooms, and told the teachers her daughters needed to leave for a short time to go home and feed their hungry pigs. The best consequences don’t belittle, demean, or drone on in an emotional or angry tone; they elicit an action. Our kids were able to feed themselves but the animals they cared for weren’t, so they were responsible for feeding them before they fed themselves.   ![null](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/20230118%20SWohlfert%202.png?width=1080&height=1080&name=20230118%20SWohlfert%202.png)   #### Timely Correction If a child doesn’t follow through with clearing the table or getting the wash into the hamper, grounding isn’t the answer. Taking screen time, car keys, or a favorite toy until the responsibilities are met for two days in a row is action-based and helpful.   #### Call On the Helpers The saints exist to intercede for us and help us grow in holiness. Share and connect the stories of Saint Thérèse, Brother Lawrence, or dozens more like them who turned simple and mundane responsibilities into a chance to grow closer to God. > [Click to tweet: > The best consequences don’t belittle, demean, or drone on in an emotional or angry tone; they elicit an action. #CatholicMom](https://ctt.ac/V7D90)   ![null](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/20230118%20SWohlfert%205.png?width=1080&height=1080&name=20230118%20SWohlfert%205.png)   --- Copyright 2023 Sheri Wohlfert Images: Canva ### Share this article [![Share on Facebook](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/facebook-24x24.png)](http://www.facebook.com/share.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Fraising-responsible-kids%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dfacebook) [![Share on Twitter](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/twitter-24x24.png)](https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?original_referer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Fraising-responsible-kids%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Fraising-responsible-kids%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&source=tweetbutton&text=Raising%20Responsible%20Kids) [![Share on Email](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/email-24x24.png)](mailto:?subject=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Fraising-responsible-kids%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail%20&body=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2Fraising-responsible-kids%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail) ** #### About the Author ![Sheri Wohlfert](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/Contriubutors/SHERI%20WOHLFERT.jpeg) ### [Sheri Wohlfert](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/sheri-wohlfert) Sheri is a Catholic wife, mom, speaker and teacher. She uses her great sense of humor and her deep faith to help others discover the joy of being a child of God. Her roots are in Kansas but her home is in Michigan. The mission of her ministry is to encourage others to look at the simple ways we can all find God doing amazing things smack dab in the middle of the laundry, ball games, farm chores and the hundred other things we manage to cram into a day. Sheri also writes at [JoyfulWords.org](http://www.joyfulwords.org). ## Related Blog Articles [ Rumpled Kleenex Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2016/06/03/rumpled-kleenex) [ Responding With Grace to Unwanted Advice Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/responding-with-grace-to-unwanted-advice) [ Six Keys to Raising Holy. Healthy Children Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/six-keys-to-raising-holy.-healthy-children) ## Comments ## Donate now [![Support Catholic Mom](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545) [![CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png?width=1806&height=731&name=CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png "CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) ##### Subscribe to Catholic Momcast on iTunes or Spotify [![itunes-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/itunes-logo-black.svg)](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/catholic-momcast/id1362352357)[![spotify-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/spotify-logo-black.svg)](https://open.spotify.com/show/15CoipHL7z61IDcYErV0b8?si=hqaQJSxDQgq7S1hxCwsoxQ) ##### CatholicMom on Social Networks [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) ##### About Catholic Mom [Who We Are](https://www.catholicmom.com/about-us) [Contact Us](https://www.catholicmom.com/contact) [Support CatholicMom.com](https://www.catholicmom.com/support-us)   ##### Associated Links [Holy Cross Family Ministries](https://www.hcfm.org/) [Family Rosary](https://www.familyrosary.org/) [Family Theater Productions](https://www.familytheater.org/) [Congregation of the Holy Cross](https://www.holycrossusa.org/) [Father Patrick Peyton, C.S.C.](https://www.fatherpeyton.org/) [The Peyton Institute for Domestic Church Life](https://www.peytonfamilyinstitute.org/) ### **Stay connected!** Don’t miss a thing! 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