Seeing our Crosses as Invitations

Denise Jelinek shares inspiration this Holy Week to view our crosses as ways to grow closer to God.

Struggles are hard. They are uncomfortable.   

As Catholics, we call these difficulties of life "crosses" and believe they are invitations from God to grow closer to Him. 

But as humans, it can be hard to embrace them as the immense privilege they are.   

Recently, I was lamenting to the Lord about a personal struggle. He tenderly showed me how loved I am, how I was making the cross heavier than it needed to be, and how He wanted me to carry it.   

Consider a personal struggle you are facing as you read this.   

Lies Make the Cross Heavier 

Several lies were consuming my thoughts: “I will never overcome this,” “I’m stuck,” and “I don’t know how to handle this.”  

The Lord wants me to notice these lies and then ask Him to reveal His truth.   

In a recent homily, the priest shared how we can discern truth from lies, saying, “The Lord speaks to us in love, while the devil uses words of fear.” That fear makes the cross heavier than the Lord intended.    

One of my favorite ways to combat lies is to write two lists: one with the lies my brain is believing and the other with evidence that each of those lies isn’t true.    

Let’s take the lie, “I’m stuck and I’ll never get out of this.”  

My list of evidence to refute this included my daily commitment to setting a plan to avoid temptation, my unwillingness to give up on myself, and the progress I’ve already made in overcoming this. I felt so much better after I made that list.  

The Cross is a Gift 

It blew me away when the Lord revealed what He has for me by giving me this struggle.    

What you are struggling with is a gift. It contains a lesson and teaches you something you couldn’t have known any other way.   

Each struggle increases a specific virtue in you and strengthens and refines you.  

Each struggle is part of your journey to sainthood and healing.  

Crosses are Healing 

Crosses show us where the Lord wants us to work: where He wants our attention, where He wants to do soul surgery, where He wants us to surrender, and where He wants to lead and guide us more.   

How does He want you to grow closer to Him through your particular struggle?  

Instructions for Carrying Your Cross 

Encountering a cross and carrying it like Jesus is difficult because we’re human with real weaknesses. But the Lord revealed that embracing the cross doesn’t mean being excited about it; it means carrying the cross well, and here’s how to do that.   

Don’t give up.

Don’t walk away from growing in virtue, believing “this is just the way it’s going to be.”   

For example, if a woman has a disagreeable husband, she might feel justified in arguing with him to show she’s “right.” In that case, she’s missing the opportunity to grow in virtue and ask God what he wants her to know about herself.   

For someone who’s tight on finances, giving up might look like spending frivolously, instead of stewarding their money wisely.  

“Resigning” to the challenges of the cross makes them heavier, and God can’t give you all the gifts He has in store for you.  

Don’t make the cross mean anything about you.

When I was encountering my cross, I was making it mean that I was doing something wrong and that I would never overcome this (do you hear the lies in that?).   
 
You may never know why you’re given a cross, but your job is to carry it well and not add to the lies.  
  

Let God lead you.

Talk to Him. Cry to Him and share your feelings about this struggle. He will comfort you.   
 

Support Yourself like Jesus would.

How would Jesus support you if He were right next to you? Make a list and then look for those things. Do you need extra childcare or a part-time caretaker? Is there a support group, a book, or a podcast you can learn from? Ask around, search online, or call your church or local charities. 

Struggles are part of life, but as Catholics, they become part of our “sainthood school” and could—dare I say—bring joy when we can see them for what they really are: a privilege and invitation to unite more fully with our Lord.  

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Copyright 2024 Denise Jelinek
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