So You Want to Take Your Kids to Mass

Katie Fitzgerald shares her advice for moms who are struggling to make it to Mass with kids.

One thing I hear a lot from moms who are new or returning to the faith is that they really struggle with getting their kids to Mass. If this is you or someone you know, I want to share with you what has worked for my family over the past decade of attending Mass with a lot of little kids.  

Commit to Weekly Mass Attendance  

The big key to regular Mass attendance with kids (or without, honestly) is making the commitment. I grew up with only one Catholic parent, my late dad, and I was so blessed to have a wonderfully devout father who made Mass attendance the center of our week. Any time we made weekend plans, the first question we always addressed was where and when we would attend Mass.

If we were sick, or the roads were dangerous due to weather, we stayed home, as the Church permits, but otherwise, there was never any question about whether we would attend Mass. The same went for Holy Days of Obligation.  

My husband and I treat Mass the same way. The one given we can count on each week is that the Fitzgerald family will be going to Mass. We have changed parishes and preferred Mass times over the years, but we never miss Mass if we can possibly help it. We simply don’t leave room in our lives for another option.  

Lower Your Expectations  

The next big game-changer for me is lowering my expectations. Many times, we set ourselves up to anticipate quiet, peaceful prayer and orderly, well-behaved children — and when we don’t experience those things, we think we have somehow failed, or that going to Mass hasn’t been worthwhile. To avoid setting yourself up for that kind of letdown, don’t give yourself unrealistic expectations. Instead, simply focus on the graces you and your kids receive just from being in the presence of Jesus in the church.

Even when kids are noisy, messy, and unpredictable, and you don’t hear the Gospel or the homily, you are still getting something out of Mass. By obeying Jesus and showing up, we open ourselves up to grace we desperately need to make it through the next week of parenting future saints, and our kids get the graces they need to learn, grow, and develop as fledgling Catholics.  

Don’t Worry What Others Think  

Another thing moms sometimes worry about is that others at Mass will judge their kids’ behavior or even comment upon it negatively. One thing I find helpful in that situation is to think about this saying: “What other people think about you is none of your business.” It does me no good to spend my time at Mass dwelling on what my fellow parishioners may or may not be thinking about me. It steals my attention away from the Real Presence of Jesus and the prayers of the Mass.  

If someone does imply or outright state that your children don’t belong in church, those comments say more about the person making them than they do about your family. The best thing to do is say a Hail Mary for the person who made the remarks, and then forgive and forget. Jesus knows that kids can be very difficult in public, yet He still says, “Let the children come to me, and do not prevent them" (Matthew 19:14).  

Jesus wants our children at Mass. This is the only invitation we need, and the best motivation for making weekly Mass a priority for everyone in the family. If we waited until our children could behave perfectly, we’d be waiting a very long time, and missing out on valuable time spent in the presence of Our Lord. Taking kids to Mass is challenging, but worth the extra effort, and with God’s help, you can do it!  

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Copyright 2025 Katie Fitzgerald
Images: Canva