To Weep with Us, To Die for Us

Praying with Scripture and the Catechism reveals God’s mercy to Caitlan Rangel as she processes the death of a friend.

My husband walked into the kitchen and I knew from the look on his face—our friend had died.

Our friend had been sick, but not for so long. After surviving a heart attack and open-heart surgery, we expected he’d be back on his mountain bike in a few months, grinding out climbs and speeding downhill with his usual grit.

But it was not to be so. After a meal, walk, and conversation with his mother, he woke up from a nap and took his last breaths with his wife at his side.

Though we know we will all die, something about death still feels like it should not be. Though we believe in God’s mercy, the loss of a loved one still wrenches us who remain here on earth.

We are body and soul, and something about the separation of the two—what we call death—seems as though it was never meant to be. The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) expands on this intuition; it says,

Even though man's nature is mortal God had destined him not to die. Death was therefore contrary to the plans of God the Creator and entered the world as a consequence of sin. (1008)

My husband and I held each other and cried, sobs spaced by seconds of silence. Our children shared the space with us. We gave hugs to our children and they stroked my face and arm and kissed my tears. I was worried our deep sadness would trouble our children, but they were calm. In fact, they were reassuring—“it’s okay, Mama, he can be with God.”

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As the mother of an infant, I wake up to nurse through the night. Though it can be tiring, the Spirit sometimes speaks in those still dark moments when the rest of the world seems to be asleep.

The night of the day our friend died, I sat in bed, half asleep, feeding our son. And the Spirit whispered:

And Jesus wept. (John 11:35)

Jesus wept at Lazarus’s death. God is so good that He gave us Jesus—His Son, our Savior—to weep with us, to die for us. What a mercy.

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With Jesus, death can be both a time for mourning and an occasion for hope. #CatholicMom

Jesus came to His death soon after He raised Lazarus. Despite Jesus’ “anguish as he faced death, he accepted it in an act of complete and free submission to his Father’s will. The obedience of Jesus has transformed the curse of death into a blessing” (CCC 1009).

With Jesus, death can be both a time for mourning and an occasion for hope.

Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them. May the souls of all the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.

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