featured image

Christine Johnson looks at how her life has changed since she prayed to learn to love as Jesus does.

Around six years ago, I prayed what I began to realize was a dangerous prayer. I asked Jesus to help me love the way He loves. I felt God warning me, “It will break your heart.” I looked up at the Crucifix and knew that Jesus loved us with a total gift of self, emptying Himself for us and ultimately dying on the Cross to save us from our sins. But after the Cross was the Resurrection.

I impulsively told God that if He put my heart back together, I’d go with it.

I still pray this prayer often, and I still fail often. As Mother Angelica once said, “If it weren’t for people, we could all be holy.” Loving people is hard because people are … well, people.

But I look at where I am today versus where I was six years ago when I first asked God to open my heart, and I’m amazed at the difference in my thoughts and beliefs. I’ve been moved to be more charitable and generous with people with whom I had huge disagreements. I’ve been more patient with people in general, though I still have feelings of frustration that all-too-often overshadow the love I’m supposed to present to people. And I have found my stances on many social issues morphing as I work to look on others with more love.

In short, I’ve found myself more in line with the universal Church.


I impulsively told God that if He put my heart back together, I’d go with it. #catholicmom

I’m not done by any stretch, and I definitely have my days where I’m cross and I complain about every little thing every person does around me. I know I still feel more anger and anxiety than love towards some of my neighbors, but I know I’ve made some real progress. 

I thank God for inspiring me through Father McKay all those years ago, and I thank Him for being patient with me and nudging me to change a little at a time to become more like Him.

Lord, continue to teach me to Love like You and lead me through the pains of this life and to my own resurrection.

Have you ever prayed about loving your neighbor? Can you look back and see how much youve changed since then?

20210331 CJohnson 1


Copyright 2021 Christine Johnson
Image copyright 2021 Christine Johnson. All rights reserved.