When Mom Gets Sick

As cold and flu season approaches, Rosemary Bogdan shares mom-tested tips for keeping the household running when parents fall ill.

Brace yourself. Here comes the cold and flu season. The children get sick: those poor little immune symptoms, vulnerable to every new nasty bug. And sometimes Mom gets sick too. What can we do to help with the bumps and waves of this season?

Please allow me to share some advice. First off, it helps to be prepared. Be sure to always have on hand fever reducers and pain relievers for adults and children alike. I like to have available Airborne, vitamin C (chewable for the little ones), cough drops, and zinc lozenges. Keep in stock whatever works for your family for getting through these times. And don’t forget the tools for preventing dehydration. Keep your favorite soda, tea, or electrolyte drink at the ready. You don’t want to have to go out with a sick child or drag yourself to the drug store when you’re ill.

Most importantly, remember that we do not face illness alone.

Like a shepherd he feeds his flock; in his arms he gathers the lambs, Carrying them in his bosom, leading the ewes with care. (Isaiah 40:11)

I love this image. He is carrying the lambs and leading the ewes with care. The ewes can rest assured that the lambs are safe. The shepherd is carrying them. And the ewes are gently led. I think of this passage as God’s tender mercy on the moms, the ewes, when they need help. They need the lambs to be carried. And the moms themselves need to be led.

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How can we allow the Shepherd to lead us with care? When a friend offers to help or to take the kids for a while so you can sleep, say yes. If no one offers, consider giving a charitable opportunity to a friend or relative by asking for that help. You will be blessed, but so will they.

Allow your young children to serve you, as they are able. Could you get Mommy a little glass of water? Could you help your sister play that quiet game? Could you go to the table and quietly work on your homework?

Mothers give and give and give. We are always pouring love into our families, right? It’s in our nature. It’s our vocation. But you can’t pour love out of an empty pitcher. The pitcher needs to be refilled. When Mom is sick, this is especially true. To keep pouring when the pitcher is dry does not help anyone. By doing so we can postpone our recovery or make ourselves vulnerable to getting worse.

A modicum of self-care is always important. It’s especially important when Mom is sick.

Order carry-out for dinner, even if you feel like you could probably drag yourself into the kitchen and make spaghetti. In fact, order enough carry-out to last for the next night too.

When the baby or young children are sleeping, go to bed. Do not put in that one load of laundry. Do not answer that email from school. Go directly to bed and try to sleep. Put the phone where you can’t reach it.

If your children are a little older, consider putting on a video. If you don’t usually allow your kids to watch screens, perhaps this can be an exception. Maybe do a little preparation for this in advance. Would you consider allowing them to watch a Bible story or a children’s show with a wholesome message? That way you may be able to sleep knowing they are fully engaged with something.

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Finally, guard against self-pity. There is little so pathetic as an ill mother with young children who very much need her. Remind yourself that this too shall pass. If that’s not what your heart is saying, try to focus on gratitude. If you’re able to be in bed appreciate the warmth and comfort it provides. If you’re children keep coming in, think about how adorable they are.

And, of course, don’t forget to offer your sickness up to the Lord. Offer it for a special intention, or for remission of sins—yours and your family’s, or for the souls in purgatory. Suffering can be a very powerful prayer.

God cares about us, especially in our vulnerable moments. Mother Mary cares too with all the tenderness of a perfect earthly mother. You can ask her, “Mother Mary, be a mother to me now.”

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A modicum of self-care is always important. It’s especially important when Mom is sick. #CatholicMom

It’s OK to acknowledge that we are not Supermom. In fact, we grow in humility by surrendering to Him in our weakness, always remembering that he carries the lambs and leads the ewes with care.

How might we grow in humility and offer a pleasing sacrifice of our sickness to the Lord when that cold and flu season starts?

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