When You Feel Nothing for God

Elaine Sinnott speaks encouraging truth into the absence of daily consolations by Our Lord. 

Discouragement 

I sat there once again, elbows on the kitchen table and my head in my hands, coffee steaming next to me waiting to be sipped, my defeated posture begged the Lord to reach out to me in my time of prayer with Him.  

“Speak to me, Lord. I need so much help,” I whispered as I thought about the exhausting day ahead.  

Soon my 4-year-old would be waking and most likely interrupting my prayer time, often saying brutally honest things like, “Mommy, you look tired. You should go put makeup on.” While these frank comments often make me chuckle, they only remind me of my burning eyes from another night of not enough sleep and the bags forming under my eyes from sleepless nights over the years. 

My other six children would slowly start waking after her, and arguments were never far around the corner. I’d have to homeschool five of them that day and I felt as though I was failing each day in that alone. One child would need his epilepsy medicine right away; another child would likely jump right into bullying his brother. Motherhood was feeling crushing in the moment. The day had barely begun and I felt suffocated by my thoughts. 

Discouragement crept up my back and its heavy presence now weighing down my shoulders. 

I had not had a “mountaintop” experience with the Lord in a very long time, and I longed for an encouraging word from Him, a reminder that the daily grind in this vocation mattered. I needed Him to remind me I wasn’t left alone, a thought I battled often due to my own earthly father’s abandonment. The silence from God was deafening on that particular morning.  

Hope 

I forced myself to scan my reading for the day in Divine Intimacy: Meditations on the Interior Life for Every Day of the Liturgical Year by Father Gabriel of St. Mary Magdalen, O. C. D. The reading was on the Act of Love. 

Speak to me, Lord.  

When our emotions are cold in our love of God, and we “feel” nothing, there is no reason for us to be disturbed; we will find less satisfaction in our love — for it is much more pleasant for us to feel that we are loving – but our act of love will be equally true and perfect. (740). 

There You are, Lord! 

Precisely because the substance of love is in the act of the will that wishes good to God, in order to make our love purer and more intense, Our Lord will often deprive us of all consoling feelings; we will no longer feel that we love God — and this will give us pain — but in reality, we will love Him in the measure that we will with determination what He wills, and want His good pleasure and delight above all things. Besides, it is not in our power to feel love but it is always in our power to make voluntary acts of love. (741, emphasis added). 

I suddenly became very aware that me sitting there, despite not wanting to be sitting there, and speaking to the Lord, was a purer act of love for Him precisely because I did not feel Him or hear Him. 

He saw me, He heard me, and every second of my time with Him mattered. 

Discouragement escaped off my back, terrified of the Truth that suddenly took its place, as I sat up straight and realized the Lord was still with me even if I didn’t feel His presence. Aridity in my spiritual life was also a gift from Him, though a painful one. 

I let out a chuckle when I realized He offered me a consolation by reminding me I do not always need consolations.   

Pure Love 

The discouragement from the thoughts of the day that lay ahead of me could have quickly made it easier to just get up and walk away from my talk with the Lord. And because of how good and patient He is, the Heavenly Father would have understood that decision as well. 

But He reminded me that I was not abandoned, that even though He’d be silent that day, everything would be okay, and He appreciated every ounce of energy I put into caring for those beautiful souls of my children He had gifted me with. 

Even when nothing in me wants to sit with Him, I realized that giving Him my time, my prayers, and my day each new day is an extremely pure act of love toward Him.  

And He delighted in me. 

Are you struggling with this, too?

Let this be your personal message from the Lord as well. No matter how much you are struggling today, remember that every act of your will to love Him in prayer and time spent with Him is seen, is a pure act of love, and He appreciates it so much.  

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Copyright 2025 Elaine Sinnott
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