Why Grandma’s Hair (and Heart) Look Like This

Lisa M. Hendey ponders how hands-on grandparenting reminds her of the importance of savoring those little moments in life.

For three weeks, I’ve been in San Francisco with my son, daughter-in-law, two granddaughters, three large dogs, and a very prissy cat. If I’m doing my math correctly (and I’m probably not), I am on Day 22 of 25 here in the City by the Bay. I came for a variety of reasons, but the bulk of my time has been spent in hands-on preschool care. I mention the animals because they are a big (literally) part of my time here, too. I’ve never owned a dog of my own, but my granddogs have taught me a lot about canine care. The things they do, and the things they eat (especially things that aren’t intended to be eaten), astound me. 

 I’ve been living out of a small suitcase with three or four outfits. I’ve determined that there is something about the San Francisco weather that renders my normally weird hair even more of a mess. I can’t seem to tame it, no matter what I do. The other day, Granddaughter Number Two and I were playing Barbies, and I pulled out her Anna doll and realized that Anna’s hair looks just like Grandma’s. And yes, I was instantly reminded of “Weird Barbie.” That bit of the movie was so funny because it’s so true. I lack Anna’s marker makeup, but that’s because I’ve barely used any makeup in the past three weeks. Had I taken time to look at my face, it would probably look like Anna’s. But really, who cares? 

What I've Learned as a Grandma

Being in Grandma mode reminds me of the most important things in my life. It also reminds me of how many times, as a younger “stay-at-home” mom, I missed out on precious opportunities with my sons. Somehow, back then, I lacked appreciation for the fleeting manner of time. I couldn’t have known that the day would come when no one wanted to snuggle with me on the couch or play trains for hours or “Please, read another book!” Back then, I thought I needed to be doing more important things. Now, I realize there’s nothing more important that needs to be done than cherishing these family members, even when I’m covered in yucky substances and look like a mentally unstable elder. 

Yesterday, Number Two and I were at the playground after preschool. I’d packed along an Easter-related craft (from the bin at Target, I’m not at all crafty myself!) and a three-pack of discounted grocery store bubbles. As the two of us settled in to assemble our craft, another three-year-old approached and asked if she could “share” (code for “I want what you have!”). I was astounded when my granddaughter, who normally has to jostle for position with a big sister who’s typically in charge, said, “Yes!”

The two girls bonded so quickly over popsicle sticks and googly eyes that our new friend’s dad invited us to stroll to the Farmers Market together after we were done at the playground. In the end, we spent almost two hours chatting, selecting fresh produce, and sharing. I remarked to our new dad friend that I wished everyone could make friends as quickly as 3-year-olds do. Wouldn’t our world be a more loving place in general if we could all just learn to share?

As my weeks here draw close to an end, I’m already missing the pace of these days, centered as they are around feeding and caring for people (and animals) who so readily express their love for me — even if my hair does look like Weird Barbie. My hair may be totally out of control, but my heart is right where it should be.

A Question for You:

What reminds you to slow down and savor the little things? 

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Copyright 2026 Lisa M. Hendey
Images: (top, bottom) Canva; (center) copyright 2026 Lisa M. Hendey, all rights reserved.