--- title: To Forgive or Not to Forgive description: Unforgiveness - refusing to forgive or ask forgiveness - is a very slow and deadly poison. The only antidote is forgiveness - given and received - through Christ-like, crucified love. --- [![catholic-mom-logo-v2](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/images/catholic-mom-logo-v2.svg "catholic-mom-logo-v2")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) [![search-icon](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/search-icon.svg)](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/2014/07/09/to-forgive-or-not-to-forgive#) # To Forgive or Not to Forgive Jul 9, 2014 6:00:24 PM  |  by [Brian K. Kravec](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/brian-k-kravec) ![to forgive or not to forgive](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/Imported_Blog_Media/to-forgive-or-not-to-forgive.jpg?width=319&height=242&name=to-forgive-or-not-to-forgive.jpg) To forgive or not forgive is too frequently the question. As Christians, we know that forgiveness is a two-way street. Sadly, when it comes to forgiving those who have trespassed against us, or humbly asking forgiveness, we often find ourselves miserably entangled in an angry web of pride and self-righteousness. That’s when we begin to pick and choose – making a cafeteria buffet out of the Word of God - and blindly pass over a simple two-letter word. “As” makes all the difference in this world and in eternity. The Word of God and the teaching of the Church is crystal clear. “And forgive us our trespasses ***as*** we forgive those who trespass against us.” – CCC #2838 In our wretchedness, particularly in times of mortal sin, we can sprint to the confession line for God’s mercy. “Our hope is firm because, in his Son, ‘we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.’ We find the efficacious and undoubted sign of his forgiveness in the sacraments of his Church.” - CCC #2839 “Now - and this is daunting - this outpouring of mercy cannot penetrate our hearts as long as we have not forgiven those who have trespassed against us. Love, like the Body of Christ, is indivisible; we cannot love the God we cannot see if we do not love the brother or sister we do see. In refusing to forgive our brothers and sisters, our hearts are closed and their hardness makes them impervious to the Father’s merciful love…” – CCC #2840 Unforgiveness - refusing to forgive or ask forgiveness - is a very slow and deadly poison. The only antidote is forgiveness - given and received - through Christ-like, crucified love. We *must* be a people of peace and forgiveness if we are to be a people worthy of His merciful love. Confess your sins and ask forgiveness. Forgive others and mend your ways, and your heart will be wide open to His grace. Whom must you forgive? [youtube_sc url="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9J6xOT3Ldw"] [*Video link*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9J6xOT3Ldw) ## **More 4 U on Forgiveness** - [7 Secrets of Confession by Vinny Flynn](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1884479464/catholicmom) - [Left to Tell by Immaculee Ilibagiza ](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1401908977/catholicmom) - [Rosario Rodriguez: A Witness of the Greater Good](http://catholicmom.com/2013/01/12/rosario-rodriguez-a-witness-of-the-greater-good/) - [Your Stable, the Manger and the Dung Heap](http://catholicmom.com/2011/11/12/your-stable-the-manger-and-the-dung-heap/) *Copyright 2014, Brian K. Kravec* ### Share this article [![Share on Facebook](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/facebook-24x24.png)](http://www.facebook.com/share.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F07%2F09%2Fto-forgive-or-not-to-forgive%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dfacebook) [![Share on Twitter](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/twitter-24x24.png)](https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?original_referer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F07%2F09%2Fto-forgive-or-not-to-forgive%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F07%2F09%2Fto-forgive-or-not-to-forgive%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Dtwitter&source=tweetbutton&text=To%20Forgive%20or%20Not%20to%20Forgive) [![Share on Email](https://static.hubspot.com/final/img/common/icons/social/email-24x24.png)](mailto:?subject=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F07%2F09%2Fto-forgive-or-not-to-forgive%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail%20&body=Check%20out%20https%3A%2F%2Fwww.catholicmom.com%2Farticles%2F2014%2F07%2F09%2Fto-forgive-or-not-to-forgive%3Futm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_source%3Demail) ** #### About the Author ![Brian K. Kravec](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/Brian%20Kravec.png) ### [Brian K. Kravec](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/author/brian-k-kravec) Brian is a cradle Catholic, husband and father. He's the Co-Founder and Executive Director of Possibility Productions, a 501(c)(3) faith event evangelization apostolate in service of the Body of Christ. Brian has proudly served the Roman Catholic Diocese of Fresno on the Board of Directors for KNXT Catholic Television, is the Steward of St. Patrick’s Faith Event Ministry for his local parish and a 4th degree member of the Knights of Columbus. Brian and his wife are consecrated members of the Militia Immaculata. For information on the MI and Total Consecration visit [Consecration.com](http://www.consecration.com). ## Related Blog Articles [ Trust and Forgiveness Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/trust-and-forgiveness) [ Forgiveness: A Paradox of Love Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/forgiveness-a-paradox-of-love) [ Choosing Forgiveness: Unleash the Power of God’s Grace Read ](https://www.catholicmom.com/articles/choosing-forgiveness-unleash-the-power-of-gods-grace) ## Comments ## Donate now [![Support Catholic Mom](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/275132/10016573-1c5c-4aa5-baba-c2ac91fe7545) [![CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)](https://www.catholicmom.com/hs-fs/hubfs/CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png?width=1806&height=731&name=CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c%20(002).png "CatholicMom_hcfm_logo1_pos_871c_2728c (002)")](https://www.catholicmom.com/) ##### Subscribe to Catholic Momcast on iTunes or Spotify [![itunes-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/itunes-logo-black.svg)](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/catholic-momcast/id1362352357)[![spotify-logo-black](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/logos/spotify-logo-black.svg)](https://open.spotify.com/show/15CoipHL7z61IDcYErV0b8?si=hqaQJSxDQgq7S1hxCwsoxQ) ##### CatholicMom on Social Networks [![facebook](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-facebook.svg)](http://www.facebook.com/CatholicMomCommunity) [![twitter](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-twitter.svg)](http://twitter.com/CatholicMomCom) [![instagram](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-instagram.svg)](http://instagram.com/catholicmomcommunity) [![youtube](https://www.catholicmom.com/hubfs/_catholicmom/icons/social-icon-youtube.svg)](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAuUqHCVPDzyMgSMaMZxxug?view_as=subscriber) ##### About Catholic Mom [Who We Are](https://www.catholicmom.com/about-us) [Contact Us](https://www.catholicmom.com/contact) [Support CatholicMom.com](https://www.catholicmom.com/support-us)   ##### Associated Links [Holy Cross Family Ministries](https://www.hcfm.org/) [Family Rosary](https://www.familyrosary.org/) [Family Theater Productions](https://www.familytheater.org/) [Congregation of the Holy Cross](https://www.holycrossusa.org/) [Father Patrick Peyton, C.S.C.](https://www.fatherpeyton.org/) [The Peyton Institute for Domestic Church Life](https://www.peytonfamilyinstitute.org/) ### **Stay connected!** Don’t miss a thing! 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