Feeling Hopelessly Lost? Make a Good Confession

Kathryn Swegart offers practical advice for busy mothers who want to prepare for their next Confession.  

My son Peter and his friend parked their pickup truck at the side of the road. Night had fallen and they planned to sleep in their truck: permissible on public lands in Nevada. How peaceful it was to be in desert lands under a canopy of bright stars. Peter stared at the majesty overhead, appreciating the constellations.

“Let’s go for a walk,” he said.

Off they went for a walk in the desert at night. Fifteen minutes passed and they stopped. Suddenly the barren landscape all looked the same. Which way do they walk to return to the safety of their truck? To walk in the wrong direction would put them in a desperate situation. In this location, cellphones did not work.

Peter studied the sky. To his immense relief, he recognized the constellation over their truck.

“This way,” he said. Stars led them back to safety.

Why Start with Confession?

I thought of this incident as I read Matthew Kelly’s book, The Seven Pillars of Catholic Spirituality. Kelly has spoken to thousands of people on this subject. One question often surfaces as he travels the globe on a mission to wake up people to the genius of Catholicism: Why start with Confession? Discussion of sin can make us squirm in our seats.

His answer is always the same: Jesus began His ministry by announcing: “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand” (Matthew 4:17). Jesus is saying turn back to God. That is the meaning of repentance. Repent means we are lost in the desert, even if just a little bit lost.

I speak from experience regarding the idea of a little bit lost. I was lost in the woods in a winter storm that struck suddenly. It was scary. How could I get lost in familiar territory? Pathways were washed out. Each little step took me one step farther away from home. Hunters talk about this experience as being “turned around.” I was walking west. I thought I was walking east. One tiny misstep at a time.

Kelly writes about this lost feeling.

When we forget that God wants us to live holy lives, we become disoriented. When we lose sight of the great spiritual North Star, we become lost and confused.

Word spread quickly about my adventure in the woods. “Take a compass. Carry a cell phone,” friends said. Good advice.

A Spiritual Compass

Is there a spiritual compass to bring us back to God? A daily examination of conscience can be that compass. Okay, now that seems impossible in a mother’s busy life. I have good news for you. A daily examen may not be as hard as you think.

Self-awareness is the key. Tune in to your thoughts. Even little uncharitable thoughts. Say a quick act of contrition. Perhaps you can say, “God, I am sorry for judging that person. Help me to turn away from unkind thoughts.” Honestly, you can do this on the fly. I have started this practice over the last few months, and it works. I can sweep the floor or fold laundry while I do a quick examen. I feel more prepared when I make a sacramental Confession.

I have one more suggestion. Get your hands on The Hidden Power of Kindness: A Practical Handbook for Souls Who Dare to Transform the World, One Deed at a Time by Father Lawrence Lovasik. Read through it a little at a time, even five or ten minutes. You will find a handy series of questions at the back to zero in on any weakness that might be leading you astray.

Just think. One little step at a time can get us hopelessly lost. One little step in the right direction can bring us closer to God.

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Copyright 2026 Kathryn Swegart
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