How to Love Yourself Like Jesus Does

Denise Jelinek ponders how to focus on the positives when we look at ourselves.

Normally, I’m a fairly positive person. Recently, however, I found I’ve been beating myself up, focusing on the negative and all my shortcomings, and being super critical of myself. Can you relate? In short, I was not loving myself like Jesus does.

I often forget that surrendering to Christ as my example on how to live in every area of my life includes how I talk to and care for myself.

I like to call this “loving myself like Jesus does.”

How can I love myself like Jesus does? This is the exact question I asked myself. Before I tell you what He revealed, you should know I’m grateful that these low moments don’t happen as often as they used to. Regardless, I’m so grateful for this low moment because it prompted me to share my experience, and I believe He needed you to know this too.

Talking to myself like Jesus would

To love myself like Jesus means talking to myself like He does. Talking to myself like Jesus means that I speak kind words, and in a manner that is soft and gentle. When I talk to myself like Jesus, I am always affirming, life-giving, and encouraging. Never shaming, blaming, or criticizing.

He would say, “Oh honey, I know why you did that. It’s okay. Let Me help you do better next time,” instead of “Didn’t you know you shouldn’t have done X. Get it together!”

Jesus also speaks in simple language which guides me to the simple answer. He never confuses or complicates things. 

Jesus simplifies; my brain complicates.

Jesus is kind; my inner “mean girl” isn’t. 

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I often forget that surrendering to Christ as my example on how to live in every area of my life includes how I talk to and care for myself. #catholicmom

To love myself like Jesus means I also care for myself as He would. I like to think about what He would plan for me if He were my personal assistant in charge of making sure all of my needs are met.

Caring for myself like Jesus would

Caring for myself like Jesus means that I know my real needs and accept myself, and I remember that God created me this way, and, this is crucial, I meet my needs.

For example, I am an emotional eater. I have accepted that–God made me this way. To keep myself safe from overeating, I do not eat certain foods, no matter what. Like God, I know my real needs.

This is crucial: I meet my needs, no matter what. This could put me in a situation that some people would choose to NOT meet their own need to “not offend” (i.e. turning down fudge made especially for me, etc.).

Instead, I try to ask myself: what would Jesus instruct me to do?    

Eat the fudge rather than be honest and uphold my self care?

Eat the fudge rather than maintain my safety?

Eat the fudge and then blame it on someone else?

You get the point. Loving myself like Jesus does means that I take care of myself like He would. Just writing that feels calming. How can you take care of yourself more like Jesus would?

He never asks us to do self-destructive or self-sabotaging behaviors, like overeating, drowning ourselves in “to-dos” or letting other people take advantage of us because we don’t want to risk the discomfort of saying “no.”

It is likely you may find yourself in a cycle of not being Jesus to yourself, in a cycle of overwhelm and busyness. It is okay.

He knows you are trying, and He wants you to know that He loves you very much. There is nothing you could do to make Him love you more. Remember, He wants to help you and to do that, He needs a little help from you to be kind, gentle, and loving to yourself, His precious daughter.

Copyright 2022 Denise Jelinek
Images: Canva