Steps for Navigating a Big Life Change

As she and her family face an upcoming change, Charisse Tierney shares six ways moms and families can prepare for what comes next.

In a couple of weeks, my handicapped sister will be moving in with our family. Acquiring guardianship, establishing services for her, finding caregivers, and planning the physical move itself has been a lot to organize and plan. Much like having a new baby, moving to a new city, or starting a new job, this transition has brought many moments of overwhelm and upended routines.   

But I have found some ways to manage both this change and the continuing needs of our large family.  

Maintain the most important parts of your routine.  

For our family, this includes daily prayer time, reading one of our homeschool books together a few times each week, sharing meals, and attending Mass as a family. Coming together for a Morning Offering, lunch, and to read one of our favorite books provides some benchmarks of normalcy that fill our hearts and stabilize our emotions, even if nothing else “normal” gets done that day. 

Make a fresh daily plan each morning. 

While I try to plan our weeks during this time of change, each day brings unexpected tasks and new checklists. After my early morning prayer time, I have found it eases my overwhelm to take out a clean piece of notebook paper, list the top three or four priorities for the day at the top, and then make a schedule for the day that includes those items. When I feel paralyzed by the to do list swirling in my brain, I just look at my schedule and do the next thing. And I know tomorrow will bring time to do the tasks that pop up today. 

Find an organizational system that works for you. 

Big changes can bring a lot of paperwork, email, and tasks to do. I use binders to sort and organize papers and documents, and have one calendar where I write down dates that important documents need to be completed and when certain phone calls should be made. Any system that allows you to easily access all important items and dates relating to a transition will keep unnecessary logistical stress at bay. 

Care for your relationships. 

It is especially important that I have one on one time with my kids and husband during this time. I maintain a standing weekly lunch date on a rotating basis with each of my kids, and my husband and I make sure we have regular date nights. My husband and I also make sure that some of those date nights are fun-focused. It’s easy to always turn the conversation to the logistics of the transition we are looking ahead to. But it’s important to intentionally talk about other topics, laugh, and do something fun together also. Your relationships still have so many other facets to them that need to be nurtured. 

Take care of yourself. 

Maintain the routines that nurture you and care for yourself as best you can. Big changes in life often involve a growing role as a caregiver, but you can’t give to others if you yourself are depleted. Exercise, a healthy diet, adequate sleep, and time to relax all help me to feel strong enough to do the next thing on my list each day. 

Trust that God has prepared your future self. 

I heard this statement recently on the Lazy Genius podcast and it reminded me that we can trust that God will give us the grace we need when we need it. We can try to plan and be prepared for all aspects of a big life change, but there will always be more than we can predict and handle on our own. And that is when we trust that the life we’ve led is the one God has curated specifically for this moment. He has prepared us well, and He will not abandon us when we need His guidance most. Trust your future self-and the grace that God wants to bestow on you. 

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Copyright 2024 Charisse Tierney
Images: Canva